gender

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i'm really sorry for not updating in so long

honestly i just didn't feel like it

but i'm back!

gender is honestly super confusing. like i thought i was a girl, then i went with demigirl, then i went back to girl, then back to demigirl again, then back to girl, then to pangender but that didn't feel right so i went to bigender, and now im questioning if im a paragirl but just go with genderqueer because fuck labels. i just say my pronouns and call it a day

so here's a list of just facts about gender i guess:

1. gender does NOT equal pronouns. for example, someone who goes by she/her could be a boy. pronouns and gender are different things, although they can be and are normally tied together. but not always so don't assume

2. gender expression and gender are complete different things. like a boy can wear a dress and be girly and still be a boy. and a girl can be tomboyish and still be a girl. gender is what you feel you are on the inside, and gender expression is what "gender" you express yourself as. (gender is in quotes because the way you express yourself doesn't have a gender, but society thinks it does)

3. STOP CORRELATING GENDER EXPRESSION AND CHARACTER TRAITS TO SEXUALITY!!! JUST BECAUSE A BOY IS SENSITIVE AND GIRLY AND WEARS DRESSES, DOES NOT MEAN HE'S GAY!!! ALTHOUGH VERY UNLIKELY, HE COULD BE CISHET

4. try to add asking for pronouns to some of the first things you ask when you meet someone. it might be awkward—i'm trying to incorporate asking for pronouns regularly as well—but it will be worth it. you will find someone who goes by maybe he/they for example who you thought goes by she/her

5. until you know someone's pronouns, just try to think of them with they/them pronouns. i know it's hard, because of the way we all grew up, but it's better. someone can look really masculine and hate being referred to with he/him. and you don't want to disrespect anyone

6. if you're having kids or thinking of working with kids, try to teach them about asking for pronouns when they first meet someone. the younger they are, the more accustomed they'll be with it and the more society will get better

that's all the points i have for now, but please lmk if you have any other ones and i'll add them and tag you

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