Before it Began

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Hank Hill: God dang' it Bobby, where's my wood?

Bobby Hill: I usually don't say this, but that sounded totally wrong.

Hank Hill: I'm serious! I know you've been drawing faces on my wood planks in the garage for the past few days.

Bobby Hill: Uuuuh, that wasn't me.

Hank Hill: Then who hwas it?

*Brian Griffin walks into the room*

Brian Griffin: Wait, isn't it what, not hwat?

Hank Hill: Hwat?

Brian: You know what, I'm not going to explain it this time.

*Hank Hill stares angrily*

Hank Hill: You better not be that dog who kept on sleepin' with Ladybird.

Brian is silent for almost 10 seconds and then says,

Brian: Possibly.

*Hank Hill grabs a broom and scares Brian off with it*

Hank Hill: Get outta here or I'll kick your a$$!!!

*Brian Griffin barks as he flees*

Hank Hill: That dog ain't right.

*a little boy named Johnny (from Ed, Ed, n' Eddy) walks in the house for no reason except for the fact the door was left open*

Johnny: Hello! Want to meet my friend, Plank?

Bobby: Uuuuh, dad, I think I found the person you're looking for.

Hank Hill: Really?

Johnny: I'm the most popular kid now with all my friends!!!

*pulls out five wood planks with drawn faces on them*

Hank Hill: Give me back my wood planks!

Eddy from Ed, Edd, n' Eddy barges into the house.

Eddy: I have an idea!!!!! (At Johnny) You could make more of these plank faces and I could sale them to make big moolah and share 0.01% with you!

A Gluckon from Oddworld tip toes into the house.

Gluckon: Ooooh, moolah!!!

Eddy: That's right, moolah! It could be used to buy giant jawbreakers!

Gluckon: How about I publish your product idea and help produce it by using my Mudokon slaves instead?

Eddy: How many slaves do you have?

Gluckon: 399 per factory.

Eddy: How many factories?

Gluckon: 2,000

Eddy: It's a deal!

Hank Hill: Now wait just a darn minute! Slavery is illegal!

Gluckon: Not on Oddworld.

Mr. Mackey from South Park walks in and joins the conversation.

Mr. Mackey: Let me just sum up why there shouldn't be slavery, m'kay. Slavery's bad, m'kay. It's just, slavery's bad, m'kay. It's bad because, slaves don't like slavery, m'kay. Slavery's just not good m'kay. M'kay.

Gluckon: But, Moolah!!!

Eddy: Yeah, but the moolah!!!

Mr. Mackey: But slavery's bad, m'kay.

Hank Hill: Everybody get outta my house!!!

Hank Hill pushes all the visitors out of the house and slams the door shut.

*door bell rings*

Hank Hill: Dangit, who is it now?

Hank Hill walks to the door and opens it to find Beavis and Butthead.

Butthead: Huh, huh, heh, huh, heh, huh, huh.

Beavis: Heh, heh, heh, heh, huh, heh, heh, heh, huh, heh, heh.

Hank Hill: What is it?

Butthead: uuuuuh, you sound like Mr. Anderson, heh, huh, huh, huh, huh.

Beavis: Yeah, I bet you smell like farts also, heh, heh, heh, heh, huh, heh.

Hank Hill: Let me tell you boys something, y'all can't keep coming to my god-dang door to got-dang say nonsense!

*slams door*

Butthead: Huh, heh, huh, huh, heh. Hey Beavis, go poop on the the door mat.

Beavis: Heh, heh, heh, huh, heh, heh, huh. Okay.

*Beavis pulls down his pants and €raps on the door mat*

(Meanwhile, in the Hill house)

Hank Hill: Aaah! My chest hurts!!!

*Chest-bursting alien from Alien bursts out of Hank's chest*

Hank Hill: Bwaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

To be continued...

Next time: Hank Hill dies, but they can rebuild him, they have the technology. Hank's bionic computer system goes haywire when he installs Skynet in his brain and becomes the "Propainanator".

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⏰ Last updated: Mar 28, 2015 ⏰

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