the convenience store guy ☾ 이희승

episode 01

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Plopping down on the new bed, I let out a big relieved sigh. At last, unpacking was done. So basically to sum it up I just moved out of my house because my college was too far from my home. Well, obviously I had fights to get my mom and dad to agree to this and when you have your elder sister’s support who is everyone’s favourite… nothing can be denied. 

This was the only advantage of having an elder sister seriously.

So well, yes, now that I have moved out of that house… I can breathe openly and at last be myself. I can study however I want, I can rest however I want… maybe I'll regret it at one point but then. Yea i need to learn.

Anywho, getting up I opened my closet. It wasn’t organised but yea, i saw my hoodie in the corner and changed into that. Taking my muffler, I stepped out with my phone ready to go out.
I have to go buy something to eat because i ain’t any mood to take a delivery and eat at that half tidy house. 

Searching for the nearest convenience store… it was pretty near barely a minute's walk. 
As soon as I entered, I heard someone say, ‘welcome’. I turned towards the voice and there stood a guy of around my age welcoming me. I smiled back at him and went straight to the ramen section.

There! I found my favourite kimchi ramen. Picking up two packets of that, I went to the cashier and there was that same guy and he greeted me nicely with a small smile tugged on his lips. He was handsome… but right now, ramen was my priority.
“Can I eat it here?”
“Yes sure, just a minute…. It will be 2389 won (South Korean currency). The microwave is behind the chocolate shelf. If you need help please press the red button right beside the microwave. Don’t leave garbage lying around, please thank you.”, he bowed to me as i gave him the amount and he shuffled through the coins drawer and gave me the change as i went to the back and made my ramen. In five minutes it was fully ready. 

I sat there, already comfortable and happy with the atmosphere. I put in my earphone and played my comfort playlist… the first song, damn i love this one so much.

It is ‘face to face’ by wayv. It is literally the best song existing in this world, like do you hear the vocals!? It is too good. More than just good- i don’t know how to say… just listen to it one time, with both earphones, almost at the full volume at whatever time you want. Just be in your thoughts, you could just feel as if someone has come to hug you when you are all alone and sad…. Anygays while listening to this I took out my laptop from my backpack and settled it in front of me, opening my drafts. Well, just so you know I want to become a songwriter. I can’t sing well, but I can at least make people let out their feelings through my words? Maybe?

So in short i have at least 100 drafts of lyrics i have written in these 21 years of my life. The only problem is that I don't have ‘that’ voice. 
I can sing, I took classes for 5 years and did nothing… but still.

As i was eating my ramen, and reading the new song lyrics… its about how one cannot breathe and is tired from all the pressure, expectations thrown on them. Basically an anxiety attack or a panic attack experience. How one just suddenly feels breathless. It feels as if the four walls are closing in around their lungs, trapping it, not allowing it to expand. The head feels as if a heavy burden is kept on it, weighing it down. 

I am not really sure how to write more about it… it’s not really easy to capture the right emotions in one’s lyrics… BECAUSE one can misinterpret it.
As I wrote and deleted, wrote and deleted after about an hour or two… I was complete with it. I wrote a full length song titled ‘breath’.

As I pulled out my earphones and settled it on the table, I stretched my arms. I was tired!

I threw the remains of the tasty ramen that gulped during this. Can’t lie but a convenience store is so much better to work in than some cafe.

I look around and there's only one more person sitting a little far away from me.  It was 8 pm right now. I can still be here for an hour.

Now I disconnected my earphones from my phone and connected it to the laptop. Opening my sequencer software, I started to work on its rhythm and melody. And this really is the toughest part. I always whisper to sing to get a nice melody unlike how everyone do it with a proper set up and stuff. 

I go to a commerce college, majoring in economics. That’s what my mom wants me to do… well, forced me into it and i couldn’t do anything. So, I make music as my uh- hobby, yes? I was so immersed into finding the right rhythm and melody that I didn't notice someone sit beside me and that it was already 9.

As I gave up halfway and yanked the earphones out in frustration.. Then only did I notice him.
“That was a pretty nice melody you were humming for the last one hour or so.”

It was the cashier guy.

“What the heck?”, this was the only thing that came to mind and I blurted it out as he chuckled at me.

He was handsome… Maybe he’s a model? But then why the hell would he be working at a convenience store. Idiot me.

“Nothing, I just thought that you ain’t aware of the time… cuz you literally didn’t hear the mess that happened fifteen minutes ago or sum….”

Frowning, I checked the time… oh god it’s 9:30 already!

“Oh my frickin jesus.” I quickly shut down my applications after saving it and copying it… well, learned from a bad experience.

“Thank you so much- uh…”
“Heeseung. Lee heeseung and you?”
“y/n. Moon y/n.”, i smiled at him.

And then made my way out before the conversation could continue because I had a drama episode release at 9:15…. I am rushing as early as possible but not before I heard heeseung say, “y/n..? That’s a familiar name…”

(time skip)

I entered a new college. Well, i was new but many here weren’t. I mean yes, this is obviously the freshmen year but, people here are all friends from high school… the same franchise.
Sighing, I made my way to the principal’s room and I got the timetable.

I was in “Mr. Jeon’s lecture hall” right now, as it said in an announcement for all the freshmen to gather there.

So yes, we were given this speech or something at which I spaced out and I was thinking about- uh… even i don’t remember.

As we left the lecture hall after a full hour, I could already hear the groans from the students and in no time the hallways were full of chatter and were too noisy. I see my timetable. 

I had… ‘business study’, we had to go to uh- ‘Mr. Doh Lecture room’. I made my way there through the signs stuck on the wall.

As I walked and walked, someone tapped my shoulder. Turning around to see who it was, my eyes almost fell out of my sockets.

“Oh! I was right, this is you, y/n!”

“Jake! Oh my god!”

Both of us shared a big bear hug, but I didn't seem to notice his friends. Basically it's been years since we met and… we were literally inseparable when we were friends, he was more than just my friend, a brother he was close to me.

“I missed you so goddamn much, like you frickin disappeared!” he says as we break our hug. Chuckling i say, “Well, You very well know how my mom is…. I tried my best to see you one last time but couldn’t…sorry”

“Aye!!!! Don’t say sorry you idiot.”

We both had such big smiles on our faces!

“Are we just going to see them being all lovey dovey…?”, I looked behind Jake and… there stood five people… precisely 2 girls and three more guys. I looked at all their faces when my eyes fell on him.

“Heeseung?”