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After Jules picked me up from Fezco's, in tears and worried for my life, I guess it kinda shook me. And so I promised I would stay clean.
But after two weeks, I found a bottle of pills in Jules' living room, after helping her take pictures for "Tyler", and I couldn't fucking help myself.
I wish I could say I felt bad, but the feeling that it gives me, the feeling when I can fucking breathe again, outweighs any negatives. Eleanor, on the other hand, had stopped talking to me.
No texts, no calls, she wouldn't even look at me in the fucking hallways. And I had a suspicion that Nate fucking Jacobs was the reason.
"You stopped texting her, right?" Nate said, snapping Eleanor out of her trance as she sat absently in his bedroom.
"Who?" she asked, and he rolled his eyes. "Rue," he replied, and she nodded instantly.
After Eleanor had told Nate the entire story, he was seething. He told her how Rue was using her, how she never wanted to be her friend.
Nate said that the girl had probably planned the entire drug situation with Fezco, just to take advantage of her.
And Eleanor believed him, letting him remove Rue on Instagram as well as delete her number.
Eleanor spent all her time with Nate now, and when he was busy she would wait at home, biding the time until she could see him. She did miss Rue though, and once or twice almost texted her.
But every time, at the last minute, she remembered what Nate said, and stopped herself. Eleanor smiled Nate, about to say something when she noticed him smiling down at his phone.
He had been distant lately, even though they spent all their time together. As she saw him typing something out, a smile on his face, the all too familiar feeling of jealousy grew in her stomach.
Eleanor was never jealous before her previous relationship. And even though she trusted him, she still wondered what he was doing. Why he only smiled at his phone now, and never her.
So as Nate set his phone down on his bed and retreated into the bathroom to shower, her eyes fell instantly on the device.
The running water was loud in the bathroom, and as she reached a hand over to pick up the phone her pulse raced.
It was unlocked, and she smiled silently. She knew that if she didn't find anything, she would feel so guilty she would explode, but she still continued to look.
