That Love

Chapter 1

The car drew away, leaving the little girl on the verge. Shaking with cold in her
thin cotton T-shirt and shorts, she sat down, arms locked around her knees, her
light blonde hair blowing messily in the wind, pale as a dandelion seed head.
Be quiet, freak, or we’ll come back and get you, they’d said.
She didn’t want them to come back for her. She knew that for a fact, even if
she couldn’t remember her name or where she lived.
A family walked by on their way to their vehicle, the mum in a headscarf,
carrying a baby, the dad holding the hand of a toddler. The girl stared at the
worn grass, counting the daisies. What’s that like, she wondered, being carried?
It was so long since anyone had cuddled her, she found it hard to watch. She
could see the glimmer of gold that shone round the family—the colour of love.
She didn’t trust that colour; it led to hurt.
Then the woman spotted her. The girl hugged her knees tightly, trying to
make herself so small no one would notice. But it was no use. The woman said
something to her husband, handed over the baby, and came closer until she could
crouch beside the girl. ‘Are you lost, sweetie?’
Be quiet or we’ll come back and get you.
The girl shook her head.
‘Mummy and Daddy gone inside?’ The woman frowned, her colours tinged an
angry red.
The girl didn’t know if she should nod. Mummy and Daddy had gone away
but that was a long time ago. They’d never come for her in the hospital but
stayed in the fire with each other. She decided to say nothing. The woman’scolours flared a deeper crimson. The girl cringed: she’d upset her. So the ones
who had just driven away had told her the truth. She was bad. Always making
everyone unhappy. The girl put her head on her knees. Perhaps if she pretended
she wasn’t there, the woman would feel happy again and go away. That
sometimes worked.
‘Poor little thing,’ the woman sighed, standing up. ‘Jamal, will you go back
inside and tell the manager there’s a lost child out here? I’ll stay with her.’
The girl heard the man murmur reassurances to the toddler and then footsteps
as they went back towards the restaurant.
‘You mustn’t worry: I’m sure your family will be looking for you.’ The
woman sat beside her, crushing daisies five and six.
The girl started trembling violently and shaking her head. She didn’t want
them looking—not now, not ever.
‘It’s OK. Really. I know you must be frightened but you’ll be back with them
in a minute.’
She whimpered, then clapped a hand over her mouth. I mustn’t make a sound,
I mustn’t make a fuss. I’m bad. Bad.
But it wasn’t her making all the noise. Not her fault. Now there were lots of
people around her. Police wearing yellow jackets like the ones that had
surrounded her house that day. Voices talking at her. Asking her name.
But it was a secret—and she’d forgotten the answer long ago.

Next part coming up tomorrow!