Sleeper

Melvin made sure all of his five tourists were present and standing by. The last time he had lost the lady from Durham who had wandered into the loos and had missed the talk at that very point, and she had complained. This was the bit that everyone came for!

Everyone was here. He launched himself into the usual King Arthur and Guinevere speech: "And here, ladies and gentlemen, you can see what was once the resting place of King Arthur and Queen Gwenivere...well at least, according to the monks who claimed to have found this at the start of the 12th century..." he gestured towards site. The outline of the grave site was marked by a black cross with a plaque describing how the Monks had found the remains after a fire had destroyed most of the Abbey in 1191.

The short plump woman wearing a red riding coat and red- rimmed glasses put up her hand.

"Are you contending, sir, that this is not the burial place of Arthur and Guinevere?"

Mel smiled patiently "I am merely pointing out that the Monks claimed to have found this grave with two skeletons inside after a fire had ravaged the Abbey, but that no remains were ever located - or if they were, we don't know where they are" he shrugged. "Scholars agree that the monks probably tried to exploit a legend to attract funds to restore the Abbey. And the publicity after the claim certainly attracted pilgrims and tourists as well as wealthy sponsors... it all helped to rebuild the site!"

The woman's companion, who was tall and thin and bold on top of his head, with a long mane of sparse greasy looking hair hanging from half way down his pate, harrumphed in mock triumph. "So, you will agree, Sir, that Arthur and Gwenivere's bodies are nowhere to be found... is this so?"

Mel widened his condescending smile. "Arthur and Gwenivere are legendary figures, sir, and there are many versions of these legends. One of them, the most... well, esoteric if you wish, is that Arthur, having been mortally wounded, was brought to Avalon to rest until the land would need him to take up arms and rise again ... to defend the realm! So technically, he would not be dead... he would be sleeping somewhere in the Summerland, ready to awaken and walk the Earth again...." Mel gave his most dramatic flourish and dazzling grin.

"But is that what YOU believe, Sir?" insisted the plump lady. Mel sighed. Another deluded self-styled historical mystery detective believing they were going to discover King Arthur's secret.

This type always believed they were about to make the greatest historical discovery since the Rosetta Stone just because they had visited the empty grave at Glastonbury Abbey. The truth was, the grave was a clever hoax devised by cash-strapped monks in the 12th century. And it still worked, thank goodness. Tourists still flocked to Glastonbury. The truth, however, as Melvin knew only too well, was far more complex.

He cleared his throat. "Sir, I said they are legendary figures, and, as such, they would not be anywhere because .... Well, they are a legend."

The two made Mel uncomfortable. He was pretty certain they were the sort who believe that King Arthur is still alive and about to step out of the mists of Avalon clutching Excalibur at any moment, but that the government and the United Nations are keeping it a secret because it would stop alien lizards taking over the world and then everyone would realize that the Earth is flat. Or something like that. There were always those who joined his tour because they actually believed Arthur was alive. This was Glastonbury after all - the town was full of esoteric shops selling anything from yoga pants to witches and wizards' paraphernalia, magical attire such as goblets, cloaks, brooms, tarot cards, plus books about spells, crystal and wands. Just to mention some of the items. Built on leylines, Glastonbury was the home of the Tor, one of the most intriguing Pagan landmarks alongside Stonehenge, Avebury, and the Huffington Horse. It had been dubbed the esoteric capital of England. A town steeped in myth and magic, so a bit of mystical legend was necessary for business and the reason visitors came. But those two were especially keen. And creepy. And, what's more, certain things were meant to stay hidden.