By the Beach

1

They had a habit of hopping in the car and driving to the beach. Just somewhere in Virginia on the lower Potomac. It had started when William was around, and had persisted after he was adopted away. They would sit and stare at the water, sometimes in silence, sometimes peppered with an occasional laugh or cry. They would build sandcastles for William to knock over, play music, and chit chat. Everything going on was blocked out for however long they were on the beach, Monica made sure of it.

She had never wanted to be with someone so much before. She smiled at the smile lines that formed around Dana's mouth when William let out a giggle. She smiled at the playful eye roll from Dana in response to a silly statement she made, knowing that eye roll was a positive thing. Dana's flowy dress kept her attention when she stood at the shore, taking a moment to herself. The way it danced across her legs. The way her hair hit the back of her neck in the breeze. It all made her smile.

And she was with her. In a sense. They spent so much time together. With the baby and without. She helped Dana with the baby, and it was always "too late to go home". They slept together, held each other, and talked for hours. About everything— childhood, science, television, and so much more. Feelings. Dana said she was the only one she felt she could talk about her emotions, her fear, with. Monica traded all of the sad stories that Dana told with sad ones of her own, so she didn't feel so alone.

They had a weekend off, for once. Dana didn't work weekends anyway, being employed at Quantico as an instructor. But there were no x files occupying Monica's weekend. At 7 pm on Friday, as she was finishing the spaghetti she made herself, Monica got a phone call from Dana.

"Hello?"

"Monica..." the tone confused her. "I want to go to the beach this weekend. I know you have it off so I booked a motel room. I just need to get away." Her heart soared.

"That sounds great, Dana."

"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning at 9, if that's ok?"

"Ok. I'll see you then."

"Ok. Love you. Bye."

"Love you too Dana." She hung up. It would be nice to get away, and for the weekend? Dreamy. She went and packed a bag— it was late spring and warm. As soon as her house was clean and in order, she went to bed.

The warm air blew through the car windows as they drove down the highway and back roads. They sang along to the tape Monica had brought of their favorite songs. They laughed and smiled at each other. They held hands over the center console. When they arrived at the motel, it was pretty desolate. The sweet teenage girl working at the desk checked them in and they walked to their small room. One bed and a bathroom, enough for the both of them for the night. The sky had turned overcast and it was humid. Monica kicked the air conditioning unit as it sputtered to life. Little streaks of rain spattered across the window.

"Dana it's raining."

"That's ok. I'm really tired anyway. I think I'll take a nap, if you'd like to join."

"Yeah, that would be nice." When they were laying in bed, it was almost instant that they drifted off to sleep, Facing towards each other.

Monica woke up to the door opening and shot up out of bed. When she gained her senses, she saw Dana at the door with some bags.

"Monica? Are you ok?"

"I thought it was someone..." she rubbed her eyes. Dana had groceries and set them down on the small table.

"I got stuff for sandwiches? It's not raining anymore. We can go sit on the beach." Monica nodded and helped Dana prepare the sandwiches. She locked the door behind them and they began their walk to the beach. It was 4 pm. The sun was still shining, but things had started to glow a beautiful pinky-orange color. They sat together on a blanket, Dana in a flowing sundress and her in shorts and a t-shirt. It seemed unexpected that with all her confidence she felt so uncomfortable in a dress. She hated the way they looked on her body. But Dana was a different story. A sundress flowed around her, like flower petals swaying in the breeze. Like laundry hanging on a line in early August. She smiled.

"What are you smiling about?" Dana's voice was laced with a laugh, but a laugh that sounded just as good as Monica's favorite song.

"Just how nice you look. Your dress. You will always be so amazingly beautiful to me, Dana." The words brought her back to the night she delivered William. It was magical, then terrifying. Then magical again, when the super soldiers fled– and even though Dana's health was in grave danger, a beautiful baby boy was born. One that she held in the helicopter while Dana was bleeding out in Mulder's arms. Terrifying but unreal. Nothing could ever compare to whatever feeling that was. But nothing could also compare to the love she felt for Dana, in that moment and every moment after. Even before that night she had feelings.

In response to that, Dana smiled big and held Monica's hand.

"You know, I have always had a hard time accepting compliments from other people, but I know you always mean what you say." Monica rubbed her thumb up against Dana's hand and smiled.

"I do. I always mean it." her face was serious for a moment, and then her mouth quirked into a smile. "I wonder how cold the water is!" She stood up and walked towards the shore, and Dana followed behind. Monica yelped as the cold stung her toes, and Dana let out a laugh in reaction. They were in fits of giggles as they danced back and forth, spinning each other around, ankle deep in the water. The sun set, and they packed up.

They sat across each other on the bed, crossed legs, with their hands joined together. Tipsy off a bottle of pink wine, they were chatting about anything and everything.

"You know I always had feelings for you, Monica. Since the first time I met you. I was angry... not at you. But when I looked in your eyes out in the middle of nowhere something shifted." Dana's eyes looked deep into hers. Monica's face softened and she smiled.

"Me too. I was so enchanted by you the first time we met. I was so sad... I thought you hated me because I was already falling in love. I knew there was some cosmic connection." Dana smiled and kissed her.

"I love you."

"I love you too!" They laughed and enjoyed the rest of their evening.

After a long walk on the beach the next day, it was time to head home. It had been an absolutely lovely weekend. Monica willed the universe to give them more time like this together. She wanted to stare at Dana all day in a flowing dress, to hold her hands in her own. To love her in the morning, noon, and night. To share a bed with her. Watch her sleeping face in the moonlight shining in through a cheap motel's window. She just wanted Dana forever.

Their drop off ritual was always the same. They walked into Monica's apartment to steal a kiss, or more, goodbye. It worked that way for Dana's place too. They said their "I love you"s and smiled at each other before parting.

Monica sat in her apartment alone. She had music on low in the background. Her mind kept reflecting on the weekend. It was just so perfect. A perfect weekend in a perfect place with her perfect Dana.