My Fucked Up Life

my fucked up life - ch.1

Simply explained - Some stuff are my real feelings and what I'm actually going through but the entire story line is fake, my imagination is wild when I'm not feeling right so I just want to write it and get rid of it. I neither want sympathy or attention, this is just me trying to find a way to cope with things.

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Sometimes I wonder why im even alive, like what's the purpose of my life? Why was I born?..

I never asked to be born, I never ever asked for my pathetic life like who would wanna be born into a damn fucking extremely strict religious family, get yelled at cuz I don't "help around" the house when I frickin do, get treated differently cuz of my gender, not having any damn freedom, get body-shamed 24/7, wake up at 6 in the fucking morning just to go to school and sit for 7 straight hours listening to crap that we don't even need to know. Like who would need the fucking complicated equations that we won't even use. Or not being aloud to watch series's or movies like k-dramas. I never asked for this any of this?

Well I guess I gotta deal with it cuz lifes not fair and I learned that the hard way, even though I hate my life i don't wanna die cuz thats just stupid and I'm not that kind of person.

I used to be the happiest most caring caring, bubbly little girl but when I became a teenager everything changed cuz I started to understand and see more and that's where everything snapped in half. I started arguing and standing up for my self but that backfired ofc.

Let me just explain what my pathetic life is.. once school starts I get extremely stressed by assignments, tests, checkpoints and my grades. School is a shitty place but it's better than being at home cuz once summer starts my parents don't go anywhere, were always at home and if my parents get a bit angry at each other they start screaming then once they're done they might or might not take it out on us. whatever I fucking do they aren't proud so I eventually gave up and stayed in my room but that triggered them ofc..

Ch.2 is when the interesting part of the story starts..