Furcorn Finds Out Santa Isn't Real and Other Misfortunes

Furcorn Finds Out Santa Isn't Real

Hm yeah said fur corn

My reddit karma is so low lmao how did that even happen

Furcorn decided that now was time to GASP post a clickbait article to his beloved site, reddit (thats redundant but idc anymore)

Using his unwashed, stinky,green feet to publish the scam, he pulled up the article, Santa Is'nt Real.

Ha this will sure get everyone's attention but first Furcorn must read it. (he likeies to readis)

MIDDLE AGED HOTTIE THWOK IN UR AREA like erm no i think im high lolollol

Furcorn was disgusted by the milf or something and just ignored it like a normal person who uses the internet anyways he read the article and came to the conclusion that

SANTA ISN'T REAL

Furcorn erupted in a geyser of tears. AAAA his painful scream was one from the history books.

How can Santa not be real? The stupid ass jellybean questioned. Who else could give those toys to me!?

KNOCK KNOCK

Furcorn lives home alone with his mother like the average redditor! Who could be at his bedroom door!?

Well, i'll tell you.

Yet, the graceful Mammot.

Furcorn, open the door, I sense a disturbance. Giggity

NO FUCKING WAY furcorn jumps out of his dorito encrusted gaymer chair and heads to open the door bc his greatest friend just made a family guy reference

Did you finally watch family guy like i told you??

Mammot says yuh but u have to open the door

Furcorn debates this, he hasnt left his room in weeks, he's on a reddit cleanse or something

Mammot decides to take evasiv measure in the form of a regret message

It's your time for corn, he puts the glass bottle through the door knob hole (he didnt have one, broke it off during an epic orgy or something idk i wasnt there)

Furcorn examines the bottle and takes the cork and eats it (he hungry) from there, the message slipped out easily.

"Dear furcorn,

I regret to inform you that I was the one who placed those presents under ur tree during christmas. I was the one who ate the cookies and milk yous set out and i was the one who pleauered you the night of august 13th 2006 at 3:45 am

Love, mammot"

Mammot sticks his finger through the hole in the door and says something quite alarming i think

"Yuh, Earth got exposed for being a pedo and all the other wubboxs are in therapy and like bc he was the son of a god,,,,, there's an absolute hell storm out side LMFAO"

Furcorn doesnt even knwo what an outside is but doesnt care. SANTA ISNT REAL!!!?!?!? HJOW HOW HOW WHY WOULD MAMMOT DO SUCH A THING!?

"I LOVED AND TRUSTED U MAMMOT! HOW COULD YOU!?"

"Yuh, we literally have to evacuate lol please open the door and we can travel to the new world!"

"NO- I CANNOT TRUST U NO MORE!"

"Yuh, im /srs. Hell is actually here, he rose. The story of evil was real. Can you believe it?"

"I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! I'M THROUGH WITH YOU< LEAVE ME ALONE U FAGGOT!"

"Yuh, the story of evil? The story that supposedly fell from the sky and landed on Rare wubbox's head, you remember that right?? It caused such a scandal after he attempted to murder everyone who is destinted to cause the original sin, the sin of the supposed murder kidnapping of oura lord and savior? Ha! Funny right? What was his goal? Kill them already so their souls travel to the new universe ha, funny little guy"

"SANTA IS REAL SANTA IS REAL"

"Yuh, it's tragic but no one has died yet. But remember it said we would built an arc in the story? That happened and we are invited on board bc im PomPom's bff. I'm such a good little pet am i? Please praise me! But yuh we have to leave now or else we will be left behind"

"..."

"I have to go, I'm sorry" Mammot ran away after what felt like years of waiting for his master's response.

Mammott didn't know that the desolate and macabre body of furcorn lies contorted on his bed room floor.

Death by a God's wrath isn't so fun yuh?

The end is nigh, and there's nothing we can do about it.

The original sin will prevail even if she hasn't died yet.

I know this because Tyler knows this (NO THIS IS SO FUNNY WHY DID I SAY THAT)

I know this because The Story Of Evil always wraps itself into our dimension.

Our fate and evil are intertwined.

We are more than monsters.