Mrs. Cerulli

Teaser

"I can't believe it, I mean --- I never thought I would have a baby, y'know? It just didn't seem like it was in the cards for us... We've been trying for two years, I was starting to think it would never happen!"

"Ahuh."

"I mean, listen, we have been trying, ya know? Real hard. I was starting to worry I couldn't have kids and my mom kept talking about how my biological clock was ticking, and then when I'd stopped thinking about it... bun in the oven!" Tara squeals, leaning back on the barstool and patting her very flat stomach. 

You sip your fruity drink loudly. Y

You graduated college last year, but you, Tara, and Maura still meet up at least a few times a month to keep up with each other. Tara dropped out with a year left when she met her now husband, and Maura has moved on to medical school. You took your degree and found a good job --- it helped to have Cerulli's recommendation letter, admittedly.

"Well, congratulations on motherhood," Maura says after a moment, stirring the straw of her drink. You are both drinking like always, and you knew something was up when Tara only ordered a soda --- she's usually like a sponge when it comes to alcohol. "It sounds like you're excited about it." 

"Well, of course I am! Adam has been nonstop about wanting a baby," Tara sighs, twirling a blonde curl of hair around her finger. "He's like, already in his thirties, and he's already so weird about being ten years older than me. He kept saying that he'd be too old to be a dad if we didn't start having one now."

"He didn't pressure you into getting pregnant though, right? Like you want a baby too, don't you?" Maura frowns, the dim lights of the bar glinting off her glasses. You're all sitting at your favorite round table in The Pub, and you're sort of glad that the tradition of meeting hasn't died off --- as much as you don't always adore Maura's bluntness, she is the voice of reason in timultuous times, and Tara is always bubbly and positive when it's a little too dark.

They're the perfect balance.

"No, I love kids, and my mom is right --- I want to have kids before I'm thirty, that way I still have the energy to chase after them." Tara shrugs her shoulders, but she's relaxed, so you believe her. She was going for a degree in education, so she must like kids to some extent. You know she's mentioned on and off after getting married about having them, but she and Maura are closer than you are, so you suppose that it would be something the two of them would discuss.

Sometimes you still feel like the third wheel in their friendship, but at least you're included. You've never had an easy time making friends, even in high school you only really had one and the two of you haven't spoken since graduation.

Life just... moves on that way, you suppose.

"Are you going to finish your degree, though? You were almost there." You ask after a moment, moving the straw around in your drink. You were disappointed when she dropped out, but she had it in her mind she wanted to be married and stay at home. Honestly, it's fine so long as she's happy --- and she seems to be. She sports around a nicely sized ring on her finger, gushes about her husband and the trips they seem to go on, and tags you relentlessly in cat memes on social media. 

All in all, same Tara.

"Mmm, I dunno. Maybe I'll finish it up, since I was so close," Tara looks thoughtful, tapping her full lips with a straw. "Buuut --- not sure if I'll have time to with a baby. I mean, I know plenty of people do, but I've never been that good at multi-tasking."

"How far along are you?" Maura asks, glancing up from her phone. She's still dressed in scrubs, her black hair tied back and dark circles under her eyes. You don't know how she makes time for meeting with the two of you with how busy she is with med school, but at least she proves that your friendship is valuable to her. 

"About twelve weeks, I think. I go to the doctor on Monday to find out --- ooo, Maura! As soon as you start practicing, you can be my doctor!" Tara grins, batting her long, fake eyelashes. "I just realized I can tell you all my bullshit and you can legally give me medical advice now!"

"You tell me all your bullshit now, nothing will change." Maura chuckles, propping her chin on her hand. "But seriously, congrats. Are you going to have a baby shower or anything?"

"I mean, probably? You two will have to help me plan it, though, I'm shit at that. (Y/N), you'll have to help me big time, okay?" Tara reaches across the sticky table, taking both of your hands in hers and making you look at her. She widens her eyes dramatically, puffing out her lower lip. "You won't let your bestie have a shitty baby shower, will you? You're good at design stuff!"

"I --- I'm not a party planner, but I'll help." You say, biting your lip. You have a degree in design, but it's for marketing for companies, not parties. "Why don't you look up a bunch of baby shower ideas on Pinterest and let us know about those, okay?"

"Oh, that's a good idea, actually." Tara frowns as she lets go, reaching for the hot pink phone resting by her drink. "I'm gonna start a whole tab right now! It'll take me ages to get it all figured out."

Ahuh.

Tara babbles on for a few more minutes, talking about a nursery and all the things they'll need to start buying for a baby. The more you listen, the more overwhelming it sounds, and you're suddenly quite glad you're not the one pregnant.

You don't even entertain the idea, since Cerulli can't give you any children, so you don't worry about it. You love him for who he is, you don't care if you have kids together or even get married; it took you years to convince the stubborn man to even move in together. It just seemed the most logical move since you spent almost every night together anyway.

You still remember the moment Maura and Tara realized you were banging their old professor, you'd wished you'd taped it. The way their mouths had gaped, eyes widening --- in horror or awe, you're still not sure.

Tara did high five you, so maybe awe.

Maura never said a word either way, but you get the feeling she was a little disapproving, which you understand. She doesn't know the full history between you and Cerulli, there are some things you've chosen not to share, and you never will. You like to keep your life private, you don't want a lot of people prying or getting too involved.

It's just... you're addicted to the man, almost for an entire decade now. There's hardly been a day in the past ten years that's gone by that you haven't thought about him. He's like Adonis, perfect and handsome, with so many good qualities that make you smile... although his stubborness is not one of them, you find he can be petty and begrudging, not to mention he still has his own insecurities to work through from his past marriage.

But if Cerulli ever asked you, you wouldn't hestiate to say yes. Admittedly, you do want a pretty wedding. White dress, family on either side as you walk down the aisle towards your husband --- you're picturing a white arch with black ribbons trailing down, rose petals guiding you forward. Maybe an outdoor wedding? No, Cerulli isn't a very outdoorsy person, but he doesn't like churches, either.

Oh, what are you even wondering about? Cerulli has no interest in a second marriage, he's said as much many times, and the man rarely changes his mind. You're content being his girlfriend and living with him, there's no sense in dreaming over something you won't have. You almost ruined your relationship last time by wanting more than Cerulli was willing to give at the time --- but really, would it hurt for him to compromise with you a little more?

Not everything has to go his way all the time.

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