Him who finds me

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May you teach me to stop lying.

If I ever decide I want to stop.

It's sweet,addictive yet sticks to you.

Shall I ever find myself. For looking into the mirror I see nothing.

Maybe I shall fall half in love tonight,So it won't last past dawn. So it won't tarnish it. So our futile love won't tarnish it, 'For the dawn can make the most vulgar things beautiful.'


And as swans glide on the the thoughtless water it reminds me of the masochist in me, just below the surface. The scars on my feet and the shoes strung on my wall like hanging bodies tell me so, Reminding me I can feel.






Am I not beautiful?

Standing in the rain soaked in lace and silk,I feel you here.

Am I not I not beautiful?


I am beautiful,when I cry. Glass shards dragging down my cheeks.



Oh save me.


Dionysus,find me in this sea of prayer, gift me with your freedom, oh god of madness,set me free.

Sadness and sympathy fade into fury. I want to scream at you standing there.

















I am pure and sweet like sugar and vanilla and milk. I am sweet for you, I am innocent for you.
Oh how I miss you on my lips, thou you have never touched them








The saints of Notre dame
Look down at me in shame. As I sit in my insanity. There is no hell such as the mind of a teenage girl. It's eating itself while draped in pink and pearls.





I yearn to be far from here,

So when I can I will run.

I will run to the ruin where the sky is blanketed and the water runs clear reflecting the gray of the sky. Vines shall run wild.

Find me there,Dionysus, and save me, As I sit here in Madness[crossed out] Peace, I realize paranoia is the mother of love so I shall avoid love and

That we need to eat god before he eats us.

-December 21st,2022

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