Five Times I Almost Said I Love You and the One Time I Did

Street had experienced a gun pointed at his face more times than he could count, so he wasn't exactly caught off guard when he was staring down the barrel of one during a sting operation for the exchange of counterfeit bills. Still, he was a little frightened- adrenaline pumping through his veins at the risky scene until a soothing moment of realization washed over him- Chris was there. Chris had his back. Chris would protect him.

That was the beauty of her- she was a safe space for him where he never felt alone or frightened no matter the immediate danger. So, when he saw her climbing down from the roof of a nearby building where she had been watching him through the scope of a sniper rifle, he babbled to distract the gun toting bad guys until she would come and rescue him, which she did. She always did.

He lingered in the locker room after the high stakes shift, if only to spend a few more minutes with Chris. Where she called the sting operation "dicey", he called it "fun", because there hadn't been any real danger to him knowing Chris was close enough to save him.

Relief- the feeling only she could conjure in him, had made way to something different. Something deeper. Something that DID scare him.

She said, "I love your faith."

"I love you," were the words he bit back from replying. It wasn't the first time he was driven to say it. He knew it. He'd known it long enough that he was certain her name was etched onto his heart for everyone to see, but she was clueless.

To avoid spilling his secret, the one that was tough to keep quiet, he deflected. Moved the conversation to remind himself (more than her) why he shouldn't say it. Why his love for her was insignificant.

"How's Ty and Kira doing?" He asked instead.

The answer broke his heart as Chris seemed conflicted and pained about the throuple. He wanted to tell her that he loves her. He wanted to promise her that he would treat her better than they ever could.

But, it wasn't his place, so when she asked him if he was interested in being in a serious relationship, he wanted to say that he wanted the relationship to be with her. Like that could fix their current situation. Instead, he just left with the words "I love you" caught in his throat.

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Distance between Chris and Street had been slowly created due to Street's new relationship with Molly. She just HAD to make space to protect her heart.

But, sitting in the armory after a long shift, all she craved was his presence. Whether he sensed that or not, he walked in to check in on her. The conversation moved quickly from work to their happiness.

Street was happy.

Chris' heart felt equally full to hear that admission but also a little broken that SHE isn't the one to make him happy.

There was only ONE thing she wanted to say to him, but she held back and instead bade him goodnight. She watched him leave the armory, and she wanted to stop him.

She wanted to tell him the words she'd been holding in.

When he was far enough away, it slipped out in a whisper.

"I love you," she confessed in a low voice, hoping it would make her feel better...it didn't. The realization and hearing herself say it for the first time, only made her feel WORSE.

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Tan said: "Tell the people we care about how important they are."

Idling at a red light, the words wouldn't stop echoing in Street's ears. Instead of turning right, he rode his motorcycle straight. He didn't even have to think. He knew exactly where he was going. He knew where he needed to be.