Why

Oh why
Why did I have to cut that deep
It wasn't worth
The scars and the trauma
It wasn't worth passing my pain on
As I become painless

No it wasn't the fact that I saw my fat
Peeking out through my skin
not even the fact that there was no blood

I was just being selfish
And not in the good way
like,
Loving and caring about yourself
Type selfish

It was in the way that I'd give my pain away
As a gift
Wrapped in a pale skin bow tie
And red wrapping paper

Burdening others with my demons
That are my duty to fight

Why did I have to cut so deep
It wasn't worth it
To have all the scars and memories
Of the pain others have gained from me

Oh why
oh why
Do I have to give it all away
Like I'm being charitable with my blue days

And again I ask myself
Why