Goodbye

Chapter 1

I was standing in my room next to my desk. I looked around. The white walls kept coming closer to me as if they were trying to squish me. I looked at my gray messenger bag that was waiting for me on top of my messy sheets. I moved my gaze to the clock sitting on my bedside table.5.29 p.m I read. I widened my eyes as I realized that I was late. I hurriedly grabbed my bag and opened the door. I ran down the stairs that seemed to not have an end. I sprinted to the door but it kept moving away from me. I looked up on the roof. There was one big clock and thousands of little ones around it. Only fifty seconds to 5.30. I needed to go faster. My legs were hurting. I could hear loud noises of clocks ticking. tic tic. Please don't leave without me. Tic tic. Please don't go. Tic tic. "Where are you going Alex?" tic tic. I turned around horrified. Tic tic. Standing there was my mother chopping something. Tic tic. My head. She was chopping my fucking head. Tic tic. I needed to go. I turned around and slammed my face against the door. Tic tic. I got up and looked out of the window that was placed on the upper center of the exit. Tic tic. I turned the doorknob harshly. Tic tic. It fell in my hands. Tic tic. I looked at the object in my hands. Tic tic. In the reflection I saw my mother turning her head towards me slowly as she cleaned the knife with a towel with a drawing of a red flower. Tic tic. I put my hand in a fist and started punching the window. Tic tic. There were two kids entering a truck while somebody taller was helping them. Tic tic. The older person looked up to see who was making all of that fuss. Tic tic. He didn't have a face. Tic tic. He didn't have a nose, he didn't have eyes, he didn't have a mouth. He had only a hole. Tic. The time started slowing down. Tic. I heard steps getting closer to me. Tic. I turned around as she walked towards me. Tic.I pounded my fists against the door. Tic . The man was scary but not as scary as her. Tic. "Please don't leave me here" . Tic. He didn't have eyes but I knew he could see me. Tic. The last child entered the van without even turning to look at me as if he couldn't hear anything.Tic.The man walked to the front of the vehicle.Tic. He opened the door and entered.Tic. He didn't even look at me.Tic. He didn't care. Tic.He put his hands on the steering wheel and he drove away. Tic. He left me.Tic "Please come back don't leave me here"Tic. "Please, she will kill me. I don't want to die like this please"I cried. My throat started hurting as I yelled. Tic." Please don't leave" I whispered as I turned around with tears in my eyes as I slid down the door and sat on the floor.Tic . I grabbed my bag and put it in front of my belly knowing damn well it wouldn't help.Tic. She was standing over me with a knife in her hands. Tic. Everything was blurry because of my tears as she lowered the weapon towards me

I woke up with a muffled yell to somebody knocking on my door three times before walking away. It was Thomas. That was the signal. I sat upon the bed. My hair was a mess. I grabbed a brush that was waiting for me on my bedside table next to my pink water bottle. It was one of my least favorite colors but for some reason it was the color of my favorite shirt and bottle. I got up and walked in front of the mirrors as I wiped my eyes. I put the brush through my long brown hair. I wished I had black hair I finded it to be a much prettier color. My older brothers Jamir and Thomas had dark hair. Well biologically they aren't my brothers since all three of us were adopted five years ago. I was born in Italy I only remember bits and pieces at least I still know my native language well while the others don't or maybe they just don't want to use it because it reminds them of their past ,even tho every child in the neighborhood was adopted and none remember much of their past and all have strange dreams or have a feeling in our gut and.they think forgetting their mother language will make it go away. I looked at myself in the mirror. I made a disappointed face as I pinched the fat on my belly. I grabbed my glasses that fell under the sheets when I fell asleep and put them on my nose. I squeezed my fist as I looked at me. I wished I was prettier.I lowered my eyes. There was a woman behind me. By instinct I turned around as my hand flew towards my brush.I couldn't see her anymore I scanned the room to make sure she wasn't real. I couldn't remember what I dreamt but I knew she was in it. I looked at the clock on my bedside table. It was 5.26. My group was leaving at 5.30, I was in group with Thomas but Jamir was in another.He was going to run away too but I just wanted to say goodbye just in case. I grabbed my gray messenger bag and hurried out of there.If I left slowly I would have remained, it was a strange thought since I hated it there but for a part of me just wanted to remember the good times and forget the bad. I walked in the narrow hall to Jamir's room. I wiped my cheeks before knocking in case I was crying. "Come in". I opened the door. He was sitting on the bed folding some clothes. When he saw me he smiled. A sad smile. His eyes were a bit red probablyfrom crying. " My group is leaving in a few minutes" I smiled back "How are you feeling?" "I am a bit anxious" " Are you nauseous." "Yes but i'm going to be fine" "If you say so, you should get something to eat from the kitchen in case it gets worse " "Will do '' We stayed in awkward silence for a few seconds until I spoked. "I have to go I don't want to be late" "Can you give me a hug before you go?" He said while countinuing to smileI walked towards the bed and wrapped my arm around him. I kept myself from crying.Why couldn't we be in the same group I didn't want to be with Thomas he was a total asshole and he was rude to everybody except his friends and the girls he founded pretty. "I love you so be careful" "I love you too." I told him as I left the room. "bye"I waved "bye"he answered. I closed the door behind me and hurriedly ran down the stairs. I entered the kitchen. I had to be quick. There was Thomas with some random girl standing next to the counter. I grabbed a little pack of chips and stuffed it in the bag. "Is that your sister? She is so cute!How old is she?"I heard the girl say. "She is ten and my favorite person in the world" Thomas responded chuckling. "No,i'm not.I am thirteen. You would've known that if you actually cared about me" I corrected him as I closed the cabinet. He looked embarrassed as the girl gave him a dirty look. "Well you can't bring food in the van" He answered. "If you don't let me bring food I will probably vomit in the vehicle. Do you prefer that?" I asked with and angry voice . The girl grabbed her bag and left through the door. I didn't notice before but she was really pretty. She had wavy blond hair,freckles and beautiful brown eyes. She was probably part of the older kids, with Thomas, who had to look after the younger ones,like me, during the escape. "You are such a bitch!" He yelled at me as he walked out the door. "You are such a bitch!"I whispered to myself as I followed him. "Hello! Can you please tell me your name?" A girl asked me as soon as I left the house. She had brown curly hair and blue eyes. She was very energetic and a bit too excited to be escaping from home. "My name is Alexandra Robinson"I responded while taking a step back. "Alexandra Robinson...Where are you?" She reapeated as she moved her finger up and down the list."You are the sister of Thomas.Here is your new ID from now on when you are in public spaces you must use the name Ashely Brook."She said with a big smile. I took the Id from her hand as she went to greet another child. It looked surprisingly real. I walked over to the van. "Kids from ages 13 to 16 please enter the van, when you are all seated please help the younger kids." Yelled a girl with short red hair. A group of kids walked towards the van, some were crying, others were laughing, others just wanted to leave that place that they used to call home. I went in line behind a medium height girl with long black hair. I she entered the van and I followed her. I sat beside her as I smiled. She answered with a sad smile. In two minutes we were ready. Three older kids named Jocelyn(the girl whom my brother was talking to), Anastasia (the girl with red hair) and a blonde haired dude named Marc sat with us in the back. My brother and the girl who gave me my ID sat in front.I took my ID out from the front pocket of my messenger bag. "This is the third time I change name."Complained the girl next to me. "Me too" I answered. " What were your names?""Iwas born in Italy and my first name was Alessia , when I moved here It became Alexandra and now it's Ashley. My brother Jamir didn't have to change name when he arrived here.""He sure is lucky. My name was Xue , the name they gave me was Victoria and now it's Beatrice"She said.She showed me her ID, I put mine next to her and we burst out laughing. "I'm 13 by the way"I said while I tried to find a comfortable position."I am 14" She whispered as the van drove away from the place I used to call home.