Misdirected Love

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Why is love so confusing? Is it because love is abstract and not intact? How can love be misdirected with no direction? Can love be a cartoon with no true substance? Or is love like a cloud so soft that another can just penetrate it? What is the true meaning of love, I can't see it? Love is like a ball that gets thrown under the bleachers.  Love is like a ball that gets handed to the next player for a home run.  I've used the word love many times in my life and my love triggered absents, brutality, jealousy, hatred and the return of lack thereof.  Should the word love be redefined? I ask myself all the time.  Maybe love should be considered lack of value exclusively to me.  Why should that be? Is it because I was born different and the definition of my birth determines how, why, why not, should, maybe, can, cannot, be loved.  Who says I do not have feelings, if I did not have feelings will I be writing this poem.

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