What if I told you I never did

Its not because of you

It was a cold day in the heavenly capital. The clouds blocked the sun while producing snow that covered all the land. The sky was dark and it sealed over the heavenly capital like a quilt. If you looked out your window you would see only the white and grays of snow. Which would usually be quite gloomy, but for the gods this was something to commemorate, especially the ones that liked drinking.

During this time of year, there was a festival, at first it was just a mortal holiday to celebrate the bring of winter, but soon, it became one of the god's traditions too. While this celebration was in session they would drink the amount of days it took for it to snow from the beginning of winter to the present, when the first snowflakes had fallen in the form of shots of alcohol. ( I tried to make this the most understandable as it possibly can be in my words but basically, if the first snow of the winter was 31 days after December 31st which is the first of winter, they would drink 31 shots) There were some that wouldn't participate because of personal reasons, usually ones of abstinence, one of these included Mu Qing.

But something had happened this specific year that made him feel the need to engage with this festival, Feng Xin.

(A few hours earlier)
My Qing was waking through the heavenly roads. There was not reason for it, this was just a thing the general did, quite odd, people had asked him why he seemed to do this every morning, but he never answered. The real reason was almost because it was a force of habit. While in the slums of Xianle, he would stroll around everyday to make sure everything was in order. Since he was seen as an esteemed figure in the slums for his work at the palace, he would the one who looked after the law in this part of the kingdom. It still felt like his duty to protect the people who had never been protected, even if they were long deceased.

He looked around and saw snowing flakes falling gracefully, some landing on his hands, instantly melting. He looked up from his reddened fingers and saw the snow piles on the various gods palace roofs, it reminded him of the time when he was a little boy. Looking out the broken window of his decrepit house, the smell of mold and rotting wood filling his senses. He saw the roofs covered with snow and the shivering of his mothers hands on his stomach pulling him in closer, trying to warm him, but really only making him colder, but it was the thought that counted not the effect itself. He sat in her lap wrapped in a blanket, wanting to give the cloth to her, but everytime he tried she would insist it was just her ill body acting up. Always using the same excuse, up until the day were it really was her illness preventing her from staying steady, but once it got to that point he was no longer a little boy, he pretended he didn't want his mothers affection but deep down he knew he just wanted to be a little boy, wrapped up in his mother's arms again feeling her heartbeat, hearing her breathe in the cold crisp air and blow it out again, the vapor spreading around until it was completely gone, her lightly perfumed hair and smooth hands. But Mu Qing knew better, he always did.

Moments like these were engraved into his memory, it had been 800 years later but it still vividly replays in his mind everytime days like these occur.

He wasn't looking ahead only at the roof of the gods manors while engrossed in his own line of thinking, walking towards the houses with the smell of a lit fireplace coming out of them. He suddenly felt something run into his right shoulder, pushing him back a step. He smelt forest-y aroma from his side. He looked to his right where the smell was appearing and see none other than Feng Xin. He was wearing thick robes in saturated colors of brown, yellow, blue, and black because of the cold weather that day, his cheeks and ears flushed a rose pink.

"What the fuck are you blind or something look at the road." The other general always had some type of attitude with him, so he returns it right back. "You're the one that bumped into me, so why are you blaming me?!" Feng Xin stepped closer the Mu Qing, grasping his collar then responded with an irritating tone "here you go again always victimizing yourself, can't you ever just take the blame, or is your pride too high for that. It must be, you don't ever seem to drink at the festival, scared of losing your streak, or maybe letting down his highness, what is it Mu Qing, are you scared?" My Qing was shook, who the fuck does he think he is? He also grabbed the other man's collar and brought the two of them even closer than before, faces almost touching, Feng xins breath was hot, slowly warming mu Qing frigid face and making the argument more heated, it was almost as if the snow started melting around them. He felt he was trying to communicate with an idiotic animal over and over again to no avail. He stated in a voice utterly dripping in annoyance, "did you ever think I just don't like to drink? Or is your brain too dense for that? Want me to say it slower?" He emphasized the end of his sentence by making it louder, more obnoxious, and lessening its speed. Feng Xin eyes twitched, he retorts back after shoving the other from his face. "fucking virgin, you're just being pussy, man the fuck up."

My Qing felt his face contract into an absolutely furious expression. Feng Xin acts all so mighty but as soon as his verbal arguments start to fail he begins to use physical force. He began to slowly walk back towards Feng Xin, snowing crunching at his feet. And cold look like the snow falling at this moments covered his face staring straight into Feng Xins eyes "At least I didn't knock some girl up and abandon her right after, I find it better that I'm a virgin and not a fuck boy that can't take care of the problems he created, and fine since you want to make such a big deal out of it, I will drink, I'll drink every last drop until you feel your tongue get swollen with all the falsehoods you seem to make up in that hollow skull and spit out of your mouth." Feng Xin seemed to look away from the other man a walked away, and Mu Qing was still the pussy huh?

(Back in present time)
So now here he was, walking up to the tables set up row after row, with one giant throne the very front. He can't believe he actually did what he told Feng Xin he would do. But he felt this argument was something more then it seemed, some hidden intent on the others part. He only hit him once before walking away, this was not a characteristic of Feng Xin.

He walked up the rows until he got about half way. Not next to anyone, at least 2 seats between him and the people around him, he sat down on the cold seat and put his hands in his lap.

The introduction speech was boring and long, he could tell everyone was on the edge of their seats and inpatient waiting for them to bring out the alcohol, taping their fingers on the table, bouncing their legs up and down. But the one person he thought he would encounter, was not present.

Or so he thought.

As soon as he had thought he wouldn't see the man, he heard a plump on the seat right next to him, he smelt that earthy scent again and looked to his side, Feng Xin.

When he looked at him his hearth jumped.

AWith a tone Mu Qing had never heard before, amusement and endearment Feng Xin said "I never thought you would actually come"
Mu Qing rolled his eyes, "stop thinking so highly of yourself, it's not because of you."