lonely trans boy...

spirals

Swimming.
I went swimming July 31 2023.
I was wearing my binder and a pair of black shorts.
Stares from everyone.. Everywhere.
I felt self conscious about this.
I went to the "lazy river" and went into the whirlpool when I got the chance.
Spirals.
Going round and round.
It started hurting.. I couldn't focus on anything.. MAKE IT STOP!!
it doesn't hurt anymore.
I'm finally out.
It's now August 1 2023
I'm sitting on my mattress.. Thinking..
Spirals.