(Silently Drowning Series - Book Three)
Alessia Fiorella Ferrari; going from unnoticed to far too noticed.
Having 6 brothers that were once too busy for you to 6 brothers that overreact over every last thing, that could be overwhelming for anyone.
W...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Niccolò Ferrari
"Alessia, are you okay?" I call through the bathroom door.
"Yeah, I'm almost done." I hear my twin sisters voice call back for the millionth time in the last two hours.
People don't often realize what comes with someone you love having depression paired with suicidal ideation.
Watching the little cogs turning in her brain when she dissociates.
Watching her zone out when someone is shaving or holding a knife.
The brief moment where she touches the tip of a knife before shaking her head and continuing with whatever she was doing.
The times she would lock herself in her bedroom and not make a single sound leading us to fear what could be happening on the other side of the wooden door.
That's the think about having a mentally ill sister, I know she thinks we are overbearing at times... That I am overbearing at times...
But when I close my eyes I still see my twin unconscious on her bedroom floor... I never want her to feel like that is the only choice...
I will never admit it, mostly because Ally would probably stab me or threaten my life, but sometimes I worry that if I so much as blink something will happen and I will end up missing it and she will end up in the same position as before.
When you choose to love someone who the world deems as 'damaged' you take a weight of their past without even realizing it.
You must be strong for them, for others that love them, but also for yourself.
You must be patient.
You may stop their bleeding and help them scare over but there will always be some part of them that remains a little broken.
If you can handle that, if you can accept the dents and the cracks, if you can get them to trust you in some wat or another, you will never find a better ally than the person everyone leaves behind.
Above all else, they know about survival, after all this time they are still here and that's a skill so many people don't realize they need.
Not until its too late.
"Manny! Are you home?" I call out when I hear the front door click shut.
"Yeah, I just got back, what's wrong?" He responds while setting down a handful of plastic bags on our small dining room table.
I slowly exhale while shaking my head, "Fiorella has been in the shower for the last two hours, she still responds if you call out for her but she has been saying 'I will be out in a minute', for the last hour."
"But the last time she did that was when-"
"I know."
For the first couple months after my twin sister killed Jasper she would still have nightmares and she would wake up in the middle of the night and spend hours in the shower, rubbing her skin raw to the point her angry red skin would start to bleed.
