warning: mention of blood.
it's been a week, and jisung is still the usual jisung who is sometimes strong, sometimes weak.
only it is getting worse.
he's coughing up nonstop and spitting out blood more often. his weight suddenly dropped and it made a big difference since last week. it was so noticeable that felix already called hyunjin to go to jisung and confront him about his worsening condition.
meanwhile, minho didn't know what to do anymore. he can't convince the younger to receive treatment from the hospital and he wouldn't even drink pain killers or anything that could help reduce his suffering. he's being stubborn and doesn't want to get treated and minho doesn't know why.
hyunjin and chan arrived at the province as chan dropped hyunjin off to jisung's house while chan went to minho's house to also comfort him.
jisung and minho had an argument the previous day, because minho hated it that jisung doesn't even hesitate to say that he doesn't need medical treatment even though he's already suffering.
he hated that he couldn't do anything to convince the younger.
he hated that he felt useless in their relationship.
minho was crying in his room. his grandparents are at the market to buy some food for themselves. they didn't know that jisung was sick. minho lied to them by telling them that jisung is busy. because that was also jisung's request to the older.
chan opened minho's locked door using the key that he borrowed from jisung because he knew that minho would do this whenever he's sad.
"minho?" chan worriedly called the younger who was sobbing and curled up on the bed while burying his face on the pillow. he shut the door behind him and just stood there.
"chan hyung?" minho sniffled and faced the younger who had red puffy eyes and a red nose. it was obvious that he's been crying for a while.
the younger frowned. "what are you doing here?"
the older walked to him, sat on the edge of the bed and hugged him tight. that's when minho started to cry hard again.
hyunjin opened the door to jisung's bedroom. and there he was, crying his heart out while hugging his knees and his face was buried in there. hyunjin teared up a bit and approached the younger. while felix and jeongin are peeking through the gap of the door, listening and looking at jisung who's still didn't sensed hyunjin's presence.
jisung hates that he made the older mad. he hated himself for not wanting to be treated for certain reasons. he knew he had to tell the latter someday.
"jisung." hyunjin called him. the younger looked up and saw a sobbing hyunjin who's just looking at him. the older hugged him tight and they cried together. felix and jeongin couldn't help it but also cry as they entered the door and they hugged jisung together.
"talk to him about it. don't get mad, don't disagree, and whatever he says, you should understand it. we can't do anything if he doesn't want to get treated. we just need to be there for him anytime." the younger nodded and hugged chan again as he continued crying.
"i have lung cancer, stage four. and i only have two weeks to live." hyunjin gasped. the two frowned as the three cried harder.
"w-why didn't you tell us s-sooner?" hyunjin managed to utter as he was sobbing hard. he looked down and held jisung's hand.
"does minho hyung knew you don't have long to live?" felix questions, and he saw jisung shook his head.
"fuck." felix looked down and cried. jeongin rubbed his back while also sniffling.
"i-i don't want to give him a burden t-that his boyfriend is g-gonna die soon." jisung said.
"y-you fool. minho hyung will always going to understand you whatever you say to him. you should tell him that later. don't give him a regret if you don't want to give him burden. don't make him regret that he never spend his time with you until that day comes." jeongin said.
"i just don't want to worry him anymore." jisung bawled and hyunjin hugged him.
hyunjin cupped the younger's face while looking directly into jisung's eyes. "it's okay, it's okay. we understand. but you need to tell him tonight about it, and the reason why you don't want to get treated, okay?" he said and the latter nodded. hyunjin kissed jisung's forehead and hugged him again.
they just finished having dinner together at jisung's place. minho and chan were also there after hyunjin invited them for dinner.
the others are doing their own chores while jisung is sitting on the couch. minho approached him and sat beside him.
"can we talk?" they both said in sync and looked at each other. they both chuckled as minho stood up and offered his hand to the younger.
"let's talk outside, shall we?" he smiled. the younger smiled back and took his hand as they walked away and went out of the house.
the others stopped doing their chores and looked at the door.
chan sniffled.
"i'm worried for both of them." he said.
"me too." hyunjin looked down.
the two male slowly walked around the street as they were holding each other's hands.
"the reason why i don't want to get treated is because of my parents. when my mother got sick, the two of them agreed to get a treatment at the best hospital in the city despite my dad's bankruptcy. my mother has a tumor on her brain. my dad did a multiple part time jobs and often comes home late just to pay for my mom's bills. but in the end, the doctors failed to make her tumor go away. instead they made it worse. they killed my mother. they didn't said anything about how they failed. that's why my dad took his own life." jisung said while they're still walking.
minho frowned.
"i hate doctors and that's why i don't want to get treated. they might make this sickness worse. or they might kill me. i don't want to leave you here alone." he said and clung his arm onto the older's and leaned in his shoulder.
a tear escaped from minho's eyes, as he was trying his best not to sob. he removed his arms from jisung's grasp and hugged the younger.
he sniffled. "i understand now. i'm sorry. if that's what you want, then i'll fully support you." he said, rubbing the older's back.
"let's spend our time together every day. don't leave me for even and second and be here for me always." jisung said and hugged the older tight. minho nodded and caressed his head.
"i'm always here for you, no matter what." he whispered.
jisung doesn't know how to tell minho that he doesn't have long to live. he's not yet ready to tell him.
he's never ready to tell him.
he'll just cherish every moment he has with him and never waste every second without minho.
his first love.
his greatest love.
his everything.
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