Haunted Night of Whispers

Celebrating the birthday party of a person who was rushed to the hospital twice for attempted suicide never made it to my list, which would alter my view in life.

"Being at my lowest is the reason why I am here today; imagine a life where you are just numb, barely living. It's hard to live a life where you have to constrain your heart." I remember my heart that was locked for half a year, and I looked at him in the dimmed lights, for the first time tonight that he didn't sit beside me, remembering how I missed him for months, and tonight he spoiled me with his presence by making sure I was just right beside him.

"We are liberal arts students! We are meant to feel everything, and as long as we have our art, we will live forever. Make art, make poems, make films, make stories, and take everything life has to offer. Live your life and do whatever your heart wants to! Enjoy the spooky night, y'all!" Everyone cheered, and flute glasses were raised while something in me shifted, and I made my move toward him.

"Hi, Bunny! What's your wish?" I halted when a woman in a Slytherin coat pointed her wand at me. "That." I said, pointing at the decoration of at the multiple skeletons hanging on the ceiling. We laughed in unison, realizing the hidden meaning of my joke, and then she asked,

"Is that skull guy your friend or ...?" her eyes pointing at him in a red windbreaker and a skull makeup that he drew. "He's Miguel from Coco, and yeah, we're just friends," that brought a flirty smile to the wizard's lips. "Can I flirt with him?" My mind went blank, but I was hypersensitive to the girl in front of me. She is tall, pretty, and witty, someone that I would like, someone who is way out of my league and someone he deserves.

"I think it would be better if you'll ask him." I said, wiggling my eyebrows as a cue of encouragement. I mean, she is far, way better than me, and that is how I pushed someone to the guy I wanted to take my chances with and walked away.

I found myself sitting alone on the stairs with a jack-o'-lantern beside me while looking at my friends dressed as school girls squealing in excitement as the wizard got her arms around him. I may have his attention all night; he gave me enough of him, and I just got high on my delusions. A voice in my mind said that I will never be the exception, a lesson that has been repeatedly taught and I constantly forget. I know I will never be the exception, but I also know my foolish heart will never stop liking him.

I moved my Chuck Taylors to his worn-out pair, and the wizard saw me. "Could I flirt with him?" The wizard asked again. This is the time that I would let my heart take control of me, foolish it may be, but it is brave. "No." I said, grabbing him by the arm and leading him outside through a series of cobwebs.

"Bunny, I said no." He stopped, and when I turned around, his hand was on my shoulder. "Did I confuse you the way you confuse me?" My hands were shaking from the adrenaline of my heart being free and his face being close to mine. I was giving him fleeting glances when he was painting the skull on his, and now, he's close, his face inches from mine, and I let all the wishful thoughts cloud my mind.

"Are you getting tired of playing push and pull with me, Bunny? Just say you like me." looking at me intently in the eyes. My eyes could never lie. I know he has seen the admiration in my eyes as I kept on stealing glances for months. He knew all along, that all I want is him, and I know that all I really want is him. What would I do?

"I like you." 

- maundette, in the world where I would rather die than tell you that I like you