brothers best friend

theo.

TW: sh

waking up in a sweat is quite possibly the worst feeling in the world. especially if its a cold sweat.

needing to get out of bed and change your sheets, have a shower and get dressed still feeling like your body is on fire.

nightmares weren't common but the build up were for theo. for example: he could be having a lovely dream about him and aurora, maybe in the future when theyre older and have half a dozen kids running around, then he'll look at his reflection and he's suddenly his father. he knows what would happen next and so he forces himself awake.

lets say his father wasnt the nicest to his only child.

the memories of the encounters with his father swarmed his mind. blurring his brain from anything other than the pain.

the boy never spoke of his terrors to anyone.

the boy suffered in silence.

the boy was 3 years clean.

the boy wanted to scream.

the boy wanted a good father.

the boy was a disgrace to his family name.

the boy sat in the bathroom silently crying through the pain he felt so deep in his chest.

the boy had suffered in silence for too long.

help me.

please lord help me.

he cried.

and he cried.

yet no sound left his mouth even as he threw his head back and screamed as loud as he thought possible.

his lungs ached.

his wrist bare.

the healed scars scattered across his arms and legs, some even on his chest.

he wished for a better life.

he wished oh so hard.

what could he have done in a past life to deserve the pain he felt in one moment.

one moment.

thats all it was.

dont cut.

dont cut.

dont cut.

he stared at the cabnet above the sink. knowing what was behind the closed door even with his vision blurred from the tears building up again in his eyes.

he screwed his eyes shut.

"FUCK!" he screamed out in agony.

theodore nott.

the only born child of tiberius nott.

fuck it.

3 years is nothing compared to a lifetime of abuse.

others have it worse.

he told himself.

think of aurora.

he stood up.

think of the disappointment she would feel.

he opened the mirrored door of the cabnet.

think of the relief.

3 years is nothing compared to a lifetime of abuse.

dont cut.

dont cut.

dont cut.

dont fucking do it.

release the anger.

dont fucking do it.

he threw the blade in his hand to the floor, cutting his palm in the process.

"i am stronger than this" he reminded himself and pushed the temptations to the back of his mind.

he slammed the door shut and punched it.

impulsive thought.

"fuckfuckfuck" theo bit his lip and shook his hand, his eyes screwed shut again.

mirror is glass. glass shatters and pierces skin. especially when you punch glass. or in this case a mirror.

theo could feel the blood dripping down his knuckles.

but at least he didnt cut.

A/N:

HI GUYS DID YOU MISS ME!?

sad chapter sorry :((

i love him so much i want to give him a big fat hug.

aLSO i have a girlfriend?! what the what?!

ive been a bit distracted recently thanks to mocks 🫶🏻🫶🏻 but im okay now and i want to keep writing!!

thank you as always for all the support KEEP COMMENTING PLEASE OMG I LOVE KNOWING WHAT PEOPLE THINK ABOUT MY WRITING (even if its negative because im always happy to improve my way of writing)

UMMM I LOVE YOU ALL

GOODNIGHT/MORNING/AFTERNOON/EVENING !!