The Game of Fate

Epilogue

Naramdaman ni Lorenzo ang malamig na simoy ng hangin na dumadampi sa kaniyang balat at naisip na habang lumilipas ang oras ay napansin niyang may bahagyang epekto ang pagkawala ng asawa.

Inukit niya ang kaniyang pangalan sa kaniyang kaluluwa, sa tuwing maririnig niya ang kaniyang pag-iyak ay nanlulupaypay siya ng bigla, at kapag naaalala niya ang kaniyang mga ngiti he feels unstoppable.

Every inch of his soul yearns to have her here now but he can't. The thought that crosses his mind was if she were watching, is she aware that his love for her will always prevail in another lifeline.

You were slowly disappearing through the seasons. I guess it really shouldn't matter that you've fully disappeared now. But here I am left with the unanswered questions. The words that we never said and the feelings we never confessed.

And there I sat, on the swing on which we would always swing on. Waiting. But what was I waiting for if I knew you weren’t coming, but yet still there I was waiting for your return like a hopeless idiot.

Lorenzo felt someone tap his back, he threw a glance and saw Klay with a sad smile on his face.

“Death anniversary niya ngayon, hindi mo ba siya pupuntahan?” And for the meantime Lorenzo felt like his heart was getting stabbed repeatedly.

“You never attended her burial, pati ba naman sa death anniversary niya hindi ka pupunta? Ano bang ginagawa mo sa buhay mo Lorenzo? Sa tingin mo ba matutuwa si Ailra na itinatatapon mo ang buhay mo ng ganito?”

Lorenzo stood abruptly and glared at him, “Alam ko! Kung may mas nakakaalam man noon ako ’yon! So don’t talk as if you know how I feel right now!” natigil si Lorenzo sa pagsigaw at napahilamos, he walked away at mabilis na nagmaneho pauwi. 

Hindi sa bagong bahay na binili niya kun’di sa bahay kung saan nagsimula ang lahat.

This would be the first time he would go back here after everything that happened,  nothing really changed, its just us who did. Lorenzo’s feet dragged him to their old kitchen, kung dati makikita ko siya sa kusina, nagluluto at masayang sumasayaw as she sways her hips ngayon its just plain memories.

Lorenzo’s shoulder shook as he tries to suppress his feelings, he didn’t want to cry again especially today. He went to the living room and sat there, look at the empty space beside him and imagined her watching Tv laughing beside him.

He tried reaching out to caress her face but she vanished in thin air, of course she wasn’t real. What am I even doing here? Sinasaktan ko lang ang sarili ko.

Pero isa na lang talaga, I just wanna see her one last time and then I’ll move on. Lorenzo walked up stairs ang unang bumulaga sa kaniya ay ang kanilang wedding picture, she looks happy yet sad on the photo while he was wearing a fake smile on his face.

He remembered saying a few bad words at her that time and remembering it now makes him regret what he did.

He squeezed his eyes shut and walked towards their bedroom. Pagbukas niya ng pinto, wala roon ang amoy ng asawa na palagi niyang kinaiinisan noon. He sat on the bed for awhile and lay down eventually.

He closed his eyes and when he opened them, he saw her sleeping beside him. Hindi na napigil ni Lorenzo ang mapaiyak dahil ang nakikita niyang natutulog na mukha ng asawa was the same face he saw when he saw her laying inside the casket. She looked happy pero bakit parang ang sakit?

Lorenzo stood up at plano na sanang umalis when something caught his eye. It was a box addressed for him, nanlaki ang mata niya when he recognized the handwriting. It was from his wife.

It was dusty so I guess It has always been here and no one dared to open it. Dahan-dahang binuksan ni Lorenzo ang kahon and saw a few things but one photo caught his attention.