"But I love him."

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     He's sadistic, but I love him.
     He's unstable, but I love him.
     He's abusive, but I love him.
     He's a "lost cause", but I love him.

5   He's been in my life for so long,
     that to be without his addictive demenor
     drops me into an inhuman-like withdrawl.

     he tells me that he wants to change,
     and I believe him. Unfortunately.

10 He's made me an emotional masochist.
     His uncaring heart hurts me,
     and I love it so.

     I hate when he changes
     even though I want him to.

15 He's sadistic, so I love him.
     He's unstable, so I love him.
     He's abusive, so I love him.
     He's a "lost cause", and I found him.
    
     Unfortunately.

20 Oh how we fall apart
     and back together every time.
    
     Yet I loved him,
     I let him hurt me.
     Yet I loved him.
25 He made it impossible for me to leave.

     Everything I knew wasn't normal
     became normal to me.

     Still, I loved him.

     I hold onto every dream,
30 hoping that one day
     he will become what I need.

     He's sadistic, but I love him.
     He's unstable, so I love him.
     He's abusive, yet I love him.
    
35 I always will, unfortunately.



Authors Note: He has read all of these poems and told me that it's okay if I post them. Plus, he is following this account. If he has a problem with me posting these, he will comment and ask me to take them down. And as I have said in the description, I am no longer with him. I blocked him on practically everything. We don't talk anymore.

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