Mr. ManagerPants (Unfinished Teaser)

Untitled Part 1

"This is the day, Squarepants."

Bikini Bottom's one and only rectangular invertebrate stood before the full length mirror, inspecting his attire one last time. "Neptune's grill, how things change."

When the overachieving frycook initially became manager of the Krusty Krab 2, his attire was the last thing on his mind. He went in fully expecting to do all the work of the familiar crew of three, and embracing every aspect of it, with or without the perk of a manager's pay. He would be fine. He could grow extra arms, after all.

For a short while, it seemed all was right in heaven, as it was under the sea. SpongeBob had been promoted to the top: His life's dream was fulfilled-or at least the one he permitted everyone to know about, anyhow. But the owner and operator, and his longtime boss, Mr. Krabs, had quickly fallen victim to the dream-crushing force known as hindsight. Having two identical restaurants next to each other, as the numbers had split their profits right down the middle. Bikini Bottomites had neither preference for either burger joint, nor inspiration to visit the same one twice as often. After watching the business between the two restaurants bob up and down, and back and forth, like buoys on the waves, Eugene faced the fact that he would have to made a change.

It made the most sense to close the doors on one, and cut his losses. But a old miser like Krabs rarely ventures into the unknown once he's already struck gold, and he was sooner to see Davey Jones's locker than he was attempt anything this risky ever again. For those reasons, and perhaps to some teeny, tiny degree because he couldn't in good conscious separate the boy from what he's worked so hard for, the crustacean dug his nubs into the sand. He would keep both restaurants, but he'd have to change one of them.

Rather than close the Krusty 2, he decided to rebrand the second restaurant with a higher class and gave it a new name, attempting to catch all the profits he wasn't making from snooty, higher class clientele. And the locals who might prefer days of the classic fast food shack would have nothing to miss, for it was right next door.

For Mr. Krabs, it was a win-win. He could have the fine dining aesthetic that superfluously warranted a fifteen dollar burger on the menu, as well as keep his classic Krusty Krab. It was like having his patty, and eating it, too.

Though the stress from all his responsibility the Krusty Krab 2 was enormous, SpongeBob never felt so proud to be so important. However, that bliss was short lived. With the rebranding came a new set of responsibilities SpongeBob had not expected. The major change that made him nervous was that the staff would be expanded. There was simply too much to do, and SpongeBob folded under the pressure. Two new head chefs, 6 line cooks, ten waiters, and a supervising manager would have to be hired. And as the general manager, it was up to him to conduct the interviews and decide on suitable candidates for the positions.

Word about the reinvented Krusty 2 swarmed over town, and SpongeBob expected no less than a hundred people arriving to apply. After all, this was the one and only successor to the one and only most perfect place in the universe. Who could refuse?

Especially right now, when well paying jobs in the secluded city of Bikini Bottom were sparse. Mr. ManagerPants was going to have a long day, and he wouldn't even have Mr. Krabs there to help him with the hiring, either. "Just use your best judgement, me boy. If you be needin' anything, I'm right next door, countin' the green."

My best judgement, huh? It wasn't the worst advice. And ascending to manager in the first place ought to have said something about his executive thinking. Still, he'd never hired anyone before. And it was going to be tough getting through all those applicants and fishing out the promising ones.

The days spent flipping patties and swabbing the deck were quickly falling behind him, and SpongeBob couldn't help but look back at them in anxious remorse, like smashed traffic cones in Mrs. Puff's rear view mirror. This was not what the thought being a manager was going to be, and in time with familiarity of the situation, his confidence was dwindling. But just like Krabs refusing to let either restaurant go, SpongeBob refused to let these changes shut him down. He would have to adapt. He was thirty years old today, and such a milestone called for changes from within to match.