This is a story about me, and Malibu, and our Investigation into the Hamster down the street. I'm supposd to be writing my What-I-Did-On-Summer-Vaction story for school, but Im going to write his story first because you should always write an Real Investigation up anyways. Thats what my friend Sharpe says. And Sharpe knows eveythng about investigations. Riko said my teacher wouldnt like the story of my real summer, and how my life started [not the birth way, the adventure-y way.]. He would say, "Oak [my name] some constructional must have happened in the past 3 month, and if you cant remember any, make some up and put them your essay instead." Riko [my uncle] doesnt exactly think it matters if its true or not, but Hayem Thumsin got in trouble last year when he said he ate his gramma. Maybe he ate her ashes, who knows though, he was in Micronesia when that happened. Mr Yotoshka said it wouldnt be posible to fit a middle-aged woman down his throat, and diget it without having to hurl the cewed remains. Yutani-from-down-the-street said Hayem wasnt in Micronesia becuase Hayem was at summer-school the whole 3 months. And you cant be in Micronesia there, and eat youre grandma there. Malibu is my little sister. Ive got another sister too, and a brother, bt theyre older than me and Tom and dont really care about hamsters much, so they dont get he credit of awesomeness in this story. Malibu is 1 year younger than me, except for a lttle while every year after he has his birthday, and I have mine, when she is the same age as me. But most of the time shes 1 yar younger so just go with it.
Anyways, me and Malibu are not supposed to talk about the hamsters and what happened to them anymore cause its best to forget about it whole, and stop hyperbolizing,and making it worse than it actually was, and all that. But we couldnt break the chain! Massacres like these cant really get any worse than the are anyways. Taht is the point of them.This is what it say in my dictionary thingy...
massacre [mass - a - ker] + a noun
a general slaughter of peoples or animals: "The massacre of millions during the war."
The dictinary in Sharpe's house said you could have a less bloody kind of massacre. It said...
massacre [mass - a - ker] + a verb
bad defeat, espcially in sports: "England was mssacred 5-0 in the semi finals."
But this massacre was more likely the first definition. I shall keep the story of the Hamster Massacre in the shed with the worms and the wasp trap and the pictures we traced from Yutani-from-down-the-street's Mom's sketches. Me and Sharpe have made a super-efficent lock for the shed door, and weve got a new password. We are the only ones allowed in the shed, except when we let Malibu and her friend, Peeka, be they get bored when we are quarreling about the shed walls, so they go in and have cookies.
