Making Boys Nervous 101

prologue

"And then he told me he liked me." My best friend, Layla, explains as she leans on the cafeteria table.

"Riveting." This is the seventh consecutive time she's told me this story. No, no, not about the same guy. It's just every time it happens the same. She makes a guy friend with good intentions, and it turns out he just wants to get in her pants. I mean, it makes sense I suppose.

Layla is a perfect specimen. She's like tinkerbell in human form. She has this long blonde hair cascading down her back, and hazel eyes with gold specks littered within the color. She was somehow blessed with these womanly curves and a flat stomach at the same time. Don't even ask me how that works.

"It's really hard. I mean I just want to make a friend that's a guy and he just ends up liking me." She complains.

Wow, much struggle. Very challenge. Pushing my rude thoughts aside, I responded. "Yeah. Sounds hard."

She laughs. "Sorry, I must sound so pretentious. You just haven't found the right guy yet, Elle. But even when you-"

"If." I correct her.

"When," she retaliates, "you find said guy, keep in mind you don't need him to be happy."

"Maybe not. Although, people say you don't need money to be happy too. But personally, I'd rather cry in a Mercedes than a Toyota."

She laughs and playfully punches my arm. "Last day of high school, loser. Then it's off to college."

I roll my eyes. "Oh joy."

*

I walk into the doorway of my house, as an intense cinnamon smell fills my nostrils.

"Mom, are you baking cookies?" I ask as I walked into the kitchen. I love my mom, but she's always taking new cooking classes trying to extend her hobby. She isn't all that great at it, though.

"Not this time, honey. I'm doing something a bit more advanced. Just for my graduated girl!" She turns around, displaying lightly burnt mini cinnamon rolls on a pan.

I laugh. "Looks great, mom. I'm going to go change into some comfier clothes and I'll be back to have some."

I walk to my room, throwing on a pair of plaid drawstring pajama bottoms and an oversized t-shirt from one of those fundraisers my school had. As turn towards my bedroom door, I catch a glimpse of myself in the full length mirror.

And I stop.

My uneven skin tone sticks out like a sore thumb. My knotted, boring brunette hair looks messier than ever. The dark circles under my eyes contrast against the  undesirable pale skin. My eyes trail to my stomach, and I grab the small pudge forming right below my chest and past my belly button.

I hate myself.

I hate looking at myself. I hate not being the one all the guys fawn over. I hate feeling like nothing next to all the other girls I see.

I've decided in this moment that it's time to make a change.

I want to change myself, and be better. I want to be the pretty one. The one everyone loves and gravitates to.

What better time to do this than the beginning of college?

It's going to be me.

I'm going to be the one that makes boys nervous.

~

hello hello! new book, new book. I'm honestly not sure if I'll continue this because I tend to lose interest in things fast but we'll see!! hopefully this book gets some reads bc honestly that is good motivation man.

this lowercase is intended btw bc my authors notes are more casual.

thanks for checking out my book!! don't forget to vote and comment etc etc💕

~mads