Surviving the Life Dax (Smythe #2)

Chapter 1

Even though this is the first chapter, it might be a bit sensitive, especially if you didn't read My Ex-Best Friend: The Bad Boy and you don't know Dax's condition.

Chapter 1

       I closed my eyes tighter and moved around in my bed, trying to find a comfortable position. It was nearly impossible.

       You're not worth it.

       I tried laying on my other side, but that didn't work as well.

       Nobody wants you here.

       My eyes closed even tighter, trying to block them out. Don't listen to them, don't listen to them.

       It should have been you.

       I couldn't take it anymore. I sat up and rubbed my eyes before pulling myself out of my bed. I walked out of my bedroom and went to the room across the hall. I quietly knocked on the door, hoping not to wake anybody else.

       He especially doesn't want you.

       When there was no answer, I slowly opened the door, wincing at the creaking sound. My nineteen year old brother was still sleeping soundly on his bed and I hated waking him, but I needed him right now.

       Don't even try.

       "Seb," I said softly, gently shaking him. "Seb...."

       Seb groaned before slowly opened his eyes. When he saw me, he sat up and turned on the lamp on the nightstand. "You okay, Dax?" he asked.

       I shook my head, so he gestured for me to sit beside him. I did and he wrapped his arms around me in one of his comforting hugs. He rested his chin on my head and I closed my eyes, hoping my brother's embrace would push the voices out.

       "What were they saying?" he asked.

       I sighed. "Nobody wants me. It should have been me. I'm not worth it."

       "I'm going to say what I usually say," Seb said. "They're wrong. Dax, they are so wrong. I want you here and you are so worth it. And it definitely shouldn't have been you instead. I wish it didn't happen at all, but I am so glad that you turned out okay."

       I chuckled a bit. "I am not okay."

       "You know what I mean," Seb said. "I'm happy you weren't killed. Better?"

       "A bit," I said. "Do you have to leave tomorrow?"

       "I won't be gone for too long," he said. "The road trip is only going to be five days."

       "What if the voices get worse?" I asked.

       "Then you call me," Seb said. "I'm always going to be a phone call away."

       I nodded before hugging my brother tighter. I had never been away from him for longer than a day, but now he was going on a road trip with a few friends. I always depended on him, but how could I when he was going to be a few cities away?

       "Are you feeling better?" Seb asked.

       "Yeah."

       "Good," he said. "You should probably head back to bed. It's two in the morning and your first day of school is tomorrow. And if they come back, just put your earphones in and put on that playlist I made you, okay?"

       "Okay," I said. "Thanks, Seb. And sorry I woke you."

       "Dax, it's fine," he said. "I'd rather you wake me up then try to deal with the voices alone. If I'm on the road trip and the voices come in the night again, don't hesitate to call me."