- The Worlds A Bit Much -

...

colorful bracelets litter the floor tiny, soft fingers weaving the beautiful colored string. Each one made being set down in a specific pile as I declared whom it shall go too.
Nowadays they sit upon my fragile wrists.
No one important enough to be given too after all who would want them after they all declared how stupid and unneeded I truly was.
No
No one would get to see all the nights spent sobbing as I stabbed my self with the needled that held the thread
It was therapeutic
I would think In my head
Stabbing my stubby finger until they bled
Hoping praying
to be accepted and make my friends happy
and if I couldn't do that at least make them laugh
So I went around acting stupid and ditzy in the hopes that their spirits would be lifted leaving mine behind in the wind
A old friend contacted me, one who I considered.. Well almost a sister
"I miss you but someone told me you're gay"
My heart dropped
Her father was a pastor and I had dated her sister for a small time until my world and hers had fallen because of one of my many dumb mistakes
"And they told me you've been cutting
I'm disappointed"
I felt my heart drop even lower than I had originally thought possible
Cause I had disappointed yet another person
So there I sat all friends either gone or disappointed in what little I had to offer
I did what my hands knew best
Pulling out the brightly colored strings that had been stored in the back of my crafts for years and began to weave
Slender, scared, and calluses fingers tangling the thread as tears had begun to build up
Each bracelet being thrown into one big pile until the sobbing ceased
The pile was fairly big and I decided then and there to save them for a time I needed some color in my life.
So now instead of reminding me of all the friendships i had the bracelets would remind me how friendless I was. But I guess I've come to terms with that now
Id rather have friends who have the same interests then friends who wouldn't lift a finger if I called..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sorry guys I don't really know if this is good or not I'm just honestly typing what my brain spews out
I might come back and edit all these things later but for now Wattpads just going to be the place I put all my thoughts hope you don't mind
-👽