Va Fa Napoli

Prologue

21 Novembre 2009

21 Fucking November 2009

There was just something about that particular Saturday. 

Maybe it was the rain or just my pounding headache from the night before, but something was definitely off that morning.

I splashed cold water on my face just to feel something refreshing and instantly wished I could wash my brain free of the toxins too. The mirror reflected my clear green eyes, no longer the glamour girl of last night. My red hair was more like a bird's nest this morning and the usual blush on my cheeks was replaced by a ghostly white color.

Groaning I sank back to my bed, retreating myself under the duvet again.

"Sofia!" The unmistakable sharp voice of my nonna (grandmother) cut through the air, sounding even worse than it normally did. At least the curtains were still closed. Bright light had an adverse effect on me when I was hungover. Maybe I could sleep it off. I curled under the duvet and closed my eyes, knowing it would be ripped off me within a few seconds.

Cold crept under my pajamas and spread across my skin as she ripped off the duvet. There was no way to describe the disappointment and anger on her face as my eyes met hers and it instantly made me regret all those nights I went out partying with my friends, while my nonna was at home, worrying about me.

She was probably clueless as to what to do with me. I was young and already screwing up my life and brain because of all my bad habits. Somehow every time I went to a party I felt a strong pull towards alcohol. It was a bad habit, but I couldn't get myself to stop drinking every single time I went to one.

"At least you came home this time, but I was worried sick last night Sofia!" She looked into my eyes somehow trying to get a reaction out of me. I was way too tired right now to actually care though. "I don't know how your parents deal with your shameful behavior."

I shrugged like I couldn't care less, hiding what I really felt. "They don't. They're never here."

The anger in her eyes was replaced with pity. She always saw right through me. "I wish there was a way I could persuade them to stay home longer, but my boy is an adult now and I can not control his actions anymore."

"I'm sorry about last night nonna. When I party I forget about all the worries in my life. It's like an addiction, feeling free and feeling like you don't have a care in the world. I appreciate you taking care of me, but I miss my parents. We have more than enough money, so I don't understand why they have to go on business trips to Italy all the time." Sadness washed over me as I realized how empty my life actually was. There were a few people who I loved, my best friend Rachel, my nonna and my parents. The rest of my life was filled with superficial friends, partying and shopping.

"One day you'll understand bambina." The grimace on her face was only there for split second and was replaced by a soft smile. "Dress yourself properly, take a shower and I'll make you some breakfast." She commanded and then disappeared from my room.

One day you'll understand... was what echoed through my head the entire time I was getting ready. I didn't fucking understand, because no one ever told me anything. My parents would be coming home next Saturday, so I made a mental note to get some answers out of them.

After I took my shower the aching in my skull ebbed slowly and the nausea had gone away, hopefully to never return again. This must be why so many older people didn't get drunk anymore, they'd learnt the hard way.

'Never again' I thought to myself, just like so many times before. The words didn't have any meaning anymore, but the conversation I had with nonna this morning did.