The Ugly Truth •Life Stories•

(1) Disorder? Part 1

•Hello world. Thank you for clicking on my REAL story. Do not use any of this as your own because all of these things have actually happened to me and this is my true feelings. My name in today's story will be Ava Anderson•

'The truth is a painful reminder of why I rather live among the lies' -Shatter Me

Everyone thinks you are fine. If you act fine you are fine. But what is 'fine'. My fine is not crying, not breaking, holding it in as long as I can until I can't.

I am a person that listens to everyone's problems and gives them advice. Yet the few times I have needed help everyone walked away. Why? Why have I been dealt these cards.

I am starting my story today. Today is the day I begin to express myself.

What makes today so special? Well hatter what makes any day special? What makes any day enjoyable?

I think in this part in just going to tell you about things that worry me or scare me. A good start right?

1) Being stabbed - this one I recently realized scares the living shit out of me.
2) Being buried alive - this has always been a fear of mine
3) Being forgotten- let's be honest we all have this fear
4) Being kidnapped - not one I think about often but when I do it scares me
5) Getting an disease that cannot be cured.

Now that you know this lets move into today's story.

I am bi polar •
I honestly never thought much about me being bi polar. That was until I was reading a story on episode called Rebelled Hearts. The girl in Rebelled Hearts found out in the middle of the story that she was bi polar. I didn't think much of it. That was until the end of the story when she said bi polar is a serious disorder and that we should all take the online test just to be sure.

So I was like yea sure just for fun. But after taking the first test it said I am a 45 on the scale of 50 the bi polar disorder. I didn't think much of it and decided to do some more. After about five more test I started to get worried.

Every test had said I am high on the chance of having the bi polar disorder and I should seek medical help. So I decided to take a test saying which disorder do I most likely have. All of these said bi polar disorder too so after about ten test I decided to text my mom.

Currently I am in a different state than my mom for reasons. She said you're not bi polar you're fine. So I'm not sure what to do? If anyone can relate please tell me. HELP! Xx- Ava

Thanks for reading!