•XO•

1

[If ur religious, I wouldn't read this book..]
Patrick's P.o.v.
"Have you ever kissed a dude?" I asked Joe.
Joe was spending the night. He was my best friend since 3rd grade when we both found out we liked the same comic series. We've been friends for 8 years.
He was laying on my couch and I was laying on my bed. We were silently on our phones, listening to Green Day.
"Yeah...I once dated this kid named Andy. He was a good kisser-"
"Wait so you did kiss a guy?" I asked gripping my phone. I don't know why I was so nervous.
"Yes Patrick!" He giggled looking back at his phone.
"S-So are you like g-gay?" I asked. Gay. It was a foreign word to me.
I've been questioning it ever since I saw this two couple, guys of course, kissing in a coffee shop last winter.
"I mean, I guess. I think I'm bi though.." He said shrugging like it was nothing. I wish I could just brush things off, like Joe. Instead, I keep every single little thing locked up inside my brain.
"Why?" He asked looking up.
"I-I wanna see if I...like guys.." I stuttered.
"Ok," he got up and walked over to me.
"Wait so..do you want to do this..like now?" I asked standing up.
"Why not?" He shrugged again smiling.
We both where inches away from each other. The closer he got, the more my hands sweated. He grabbed my cheek and pulled me in until our lips touched.
I can't believe I'm kissing my best friend.
I grabbed his waist and pulled him closer than he already was. He put his arms around my neck and started kissing me passionately while I was kissing back with the same force.
We both opened our mouths at the same time. He bite my lip and I accidentally let out a moan.
I hope my Dad didn't hear that.
He pulled away, pushed me into his bed, and went on top of me.
Our lips met again. His one leg, between mine, and the other next to my right leg. His thigh brushed my bulge and I let out another moan.
I think I heard footsteps but I hear things all the time so I ignored it as I cupped Joe's ass. He was grinding on me. And I loved it.
I'm gay as fuck.
My door flew open and we both jumped.
"What the.." My dad said confused.
I pushed Joe off and got up.
"I-It's not what it L-looks like dad-"
"Joe I think it's time for you to go home." My dad said sternly.
He quickly grabbed his back pack and looked at me.
"I'll s-see you at school bro," he ran down the steps. I heard the front door close.
"What the hell was that Patrick?" He asked.
"I-I don't k-know I was just-"
"No son of mine is gay!" His voice getting louder and louder.
I wonder what our neighbors are thinking right now.
"I w-was just-"
"My son is not a faggot!" He screamed, "I'm sending you to catholic school!"
"Nononono Dad please!" I whined.
"You're not one of those fags, Patrick! You're a straight boy!" He yelled and smacked me across my face. I yelped in pain. He was about to hit me again but I blocked myself. He walked out of my room, slamming the door. I thought my ceiling would break.
I was angry. and hurt.
My dad can't control the fact that I'm gay! He can't just send me somewhere where there's more boys just my make me straight! I can't believe he said those...those awful words. And he..he hit me. I thought my dad loved me.
Tears started flowing down my cheeks. Angry tears. Then sad tears. My breathing was shaky and my head was fuzzy. I didn't expect this to happen. I never wanted this to happen. I fell back onto my bed and let all of the tears out until I fell asleep.
-----
I woke up the next morning with a screaming head ache. My head was pounding and my eyes were puffy and red. I rubbed them anyways and remembered what happened last night. Joe. My dad. School.
'Shit!' I thought. I went downstairs and walked into the kitchen.
Patrick,
I'm going to your school to get all of your records so I can switch you to Boys United. I'll be back by 12:30
-Dad
I looked at the time.
It was 12:20
Boys United sounded like a cub scout camp.
I scoffed to myself and grabbed a bowl, milk, a spoon, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, My favorite cereal.
I poured myself a bowl of that as I turned on the tv.
A knock came from my door.
"Hello?" I said opening it. It was Joe.
"H-Hey man.." he was mumbling and looking down with his hands in his pockets.
"Oh. Hi." I said crossing my arms.
"Are you mad at me?" He asked.
"Uh..A little!" I said, my voice wavering a bit.
"Why?" He asked taking his hands out of his pockets.
"Because you tried to have sex with me! I just wanted a kiss! Not loose my virginity to my best friend!" I yelled throwing my arms up.
"Dude keep it down my Mom is across the street!" He whispered loudly.
I sighed deeply and rolled my eyes.
"Can I come in?" He asked.
"I don't know....Are you gonna rape me?" I asked crossing my arms again.
"Oh shut the fuck up, Pat! You liked it and I know you did! You grabbed my ass for Gods sake!"
"You know what?! If your just gonna be an asshole, leave!" I hissed.
"I just wanted to come and apologize." He said.
"Why should I accept it?! I'm moving schools because of you!"
"Hey, you're the one who wanted to kiss a dude!" He yelled back.
My dads car pulled in the driveway.
"I would go if I were you." I said.
He left with his hands back in his pocket, looking down.
"Why was he here?" My dad asked concerned.
"He wanted to borrow a game." I lied.
My dad nodded and walked in.
Well there goes a friend. Im a friendless loser who's gay now. Great.