The Other F Word

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ONE

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Angry buzzing surrounded the hollow cypress tree where Dekram and her friend, Layol hid.

Dekram's wings quivered like a rainbow oil slick on a puddle as she wrapped them around her body and scooted further into the hollow of the cypress. Her wings parted, and, with a gasp, sage-green eyes worried a look at her friend. "Oh, for the love of Disney, Lay! Get back in here!" Dekram rushed a whisper. "They're swarming, you idiot."

Layol giggled over her shoulder then wiggled back into the tree and perched on her heels, wings vibrating excitement. "Pixin' enchantin', right? I've never seen so many Fire fairies in one place. Don't ya wanna know what's up with that?"

Dekram's wings shivered. "No! The Skulls are out there!"

"You think they're working the rest of the Fire fairies up to go all lost boys on us during the mock missions?"

"Really, Lay?" Dekram spread her wings so Layol could see her eyes roll. "It's not like they've been allowed to go into the human world for the last century or so."

"Well, they're sure not playing soccer with a roly-poly." Layol popped her head out of the hole in the cypress.

"Do not! Attract them!" Dekram shrieked, pushing farther into the shadows. "They file their teeth wicked pointy, their tattoos scare me, and they always stink of rancid honey."

Layol turned, hands flipped out, palms up. "And we care about their personal hygiene, why?"

"Did you not hear, 'always stink of rancid honey'? They're in-ee-bri-A-ted!" Dekram rapid fired. "We're a gnat's butt away from getting a mission. If you attract them to us and we get caught-"

"Okay! Do I look like I'm rushin' out to ask them anything?" Layol said, butt in the air, upper body hanging out of the hole in the tree. "Impin' right, I'm not. Besides, they're leaving, and it's just as well."

Layol back-winged a half circle until she hovered in front of Dekram. ''We need to get to class. You so totally do not need another deficiency mark, gal pal. So, unless you can pull a Wendy and wish us to Neverland, we best get our wings on."

"I will never understand why Fire fairies are not institutionalized by the time they turn eighteen. All they care about is drinking and mating." Dekram unfolded her wings, stood, and fingered her long red curls. "You sure they're gone?"

"Yesssss," Layol said, working a fist with her hip. "Give it a rest. Maybe I wouldn't go lip-to-lip with a Skull—those buzz-saw teeth—and sure, the whole drunken bad-boy fairy thing could be a big carnal thrill-kill, but c'mon, if they stayed sober they'd be a major attraction in an 'I know I'm not supposed to be doing this' kind of way."

"Grimm calamities! You so didn't just say that!" Dekram made a fist and worried two front teeth with a thumbnail.

"Just sayin'—not doin'."

"I can only hope, because that would definitely be a series of unfortunate events." Dekram glanced at the exit. "Can you see Renrad? Is he still tethered to the bush by the pond?"

Layol blew a melodramatic sigh and looked out of the hole in the trunk. "Your dragonfly is safe. Now can we get to school before the first bell rings?"

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In second period humanities, Mrs. Ecarg, an Earth fairy with reddish-brown hair cut short around her face, and a tent-like flowered dress covering her bulbous body, wrote homework assignments on the blackboard. Behind her, students passed notes, their faces dressed in dramatic expressions, while others whispered exaggerations, teased or taunted.