***SMALL TRIGGER WARNING***
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TONY'S POV
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"She won't answer her phone." I cry to Vic as we finish up the song we had been working on. "Go check on her, man. We'll pick it up from here." he says, understanding how I feel.
I've been having problems with my girlfriend (Y/N) lately. She's just been uncontrollably sad and I'm scared for her. She told me she'd been having thoughts of suicide and getting back into old habits.
When we first got together, she was going through a hard time. I was able to help her with that and she overcame so many things. I'm beyond being proud of her.
But she told me she's been feeling the same way she did then, now. And I'm afraid she's going to break. Her not answering my calls or texts scares me more than anything else.
I can't lose her.
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"Call her one more time." Jaime says in hopes of making me feel a bit better. "If she doesn't answer, I'll take you home." Nodding my head, I hold my phone up to my ear.
It rang and rang, but no answer. The only thing I got was her voicemail. I can't deal with this right now. I need to be at home. I need to find her, make sure she's okay.
"Jaime we need to go. Now. I have to find her!" I say, panicking even more than before. Standing up, we both run out the door and down to the car.
Jaime said he'd drive because he doesn't think I'm stable enough to do so myself. I just wanted to be at my house now. Not knowing if she's okay is tearing me apart.
What if I get there and her body is there but she's gone? I don't think I'd be able to handle that. She is my everything. Without her, there is no me.
Before Jaime could completely stop the car I was already out the door and running up the front lawn to the house. Thank god she didn't have the door locked.
Bursting through, I search every room downstairs before making my way to the top floor where our room was. I made sure I checked the bathroom upstairs as well as the spare room and office.
She was no where to be found. But I hadn't checked the bedroom yet. Maybe because I was scared of what I might have possibly found. Pushing through the bedroom, I see her motionless body laying on the bed.
Was I too late? Walking over to her I felt like my heart was going to explode. I could hardly see, my eyes were filled with unsure tears. Nudging her lightly, she doesn't move.
"(Y/N)?" I question in hopes of her just being asleep. There was still no response. Shaking her body lightly, I repeat her name once more. And that's when it happened.
Rolling over to her other side, she completely ignores me. "Baby.." I say loudly, hoping she would sit up and talk to me. "Tony what the fuck, I'm trying to sleep." she growls at me from under the blankets.
"Baby please wake up." I just wanted to talk to her, make sure she was okay. "Tony, what's going on?" she asks as she finally sits up with me. I think she knew I was crying.
"Tone?" her small voice had so much worry in it. But I was the one who should have been worried. "I thought you were dead!" I finally cry out, allowing my own tears to fall freely.
"I tried calling you, I tried calling the house. I sent you multiple texts and I heard nothing back. Do you know how fucking scared I was? I thought I lost you (Y/N)!'
I didn't mean to yell at her, but I couldn't help it. She scared the hell out of me. "I'm so sorry." she mumbles in response because breaking down into tears as well.
Cradling her in my arms, I try to comfort her. "Why did you think that?" DId she really not know? Had she forgotten the things we've talked about the past couple of nights.
I'd stayed up until 3 in the morning with her two days straight while she cried and poured out her thoughts to me. "Because you're getting bad again. I've been worrying about you so much and you didn't even know it."
"I didn't mean to hurt you like this Tony. I really didn't. I had no idea me being this was has affected you in such a harsh manner. That's not what I intended. I just wanted you to know how I've been feeling. I didn't want to hold it in anymore. I'm so sorry."
Shaking my head, I bring her's into my chest and stroke her hair. "Please don't apologize. I'm gad you told me everything that you've been thinking about. I want to know, those are things I need to know. I've helped you once before, it's my job to do it again. I'll get you through this baby. I promise you I will. I love you so much, I don't want to lose you. Not tonight, not tomorrow, not ever."
