Drowning in my own thoughts

~1~

That feeling that won't go away , stuck in your head at 4am and never leaves , the feeling of not being able to control your own mind , you try to control your mind but something inside won't let you do it , you take all the medication and drugs just to try to fall asleep to get the demons and whispers to just STOP! You close your eyes and the only thing you see is black and hear whispers in your ears telling you to do this and do that . The things they tell you can never be understanding can never be understood of these monsters controlling me , I feel shivers and cold chills go down my spin it's like laying on a thin layer of ice , feels like you have nothing on your body , not being able to move just stuck there , your lips are chapped and dry with no colour at all , your eyes with dark black circles, like you haven't slept for months, you look around you all you see is this gloomy blue colour in the sky with no clouds not even wind , nothing around you just that thin layer of baby blue ice that's so cold it makes your body turn purple , the only thing you hear is those same whispers in your head laughing and giggling putting you down just won't stop your at the point where you just can't take the awful sounds anymore telling you what to do so you finally give up ... you get up and jump on the ice until it finally decides to crack you fall under and you see bubbles coming from your mouth it's so cold you keep kicking to get back up but something keeps grabbing you back down under you can't take in anymore finally you close your eyes and lay on your back and you just start floating the same thoughts going through your head you can't take it much longer you now been under for 3 long minutes .... and suddenly you hit the bottom you can no longer hear those thoughts see that grey water , hear the whispers .... the demons have taken over you , they always win....