A Year & Change

A Year...

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One year... 12 months... 365 days.... 525,600 minutes... but it feels like an eternity without seeing your face, your smile, your laugh, or hearing your guitar in the middle of the nights. My best friend for a short 16 years, but a grateful 16 years. I stare out into the dark night; I can see the stars and I know he is somewhere up there.

He has to be right?

My father has been gone exactly a year, and a day doesn't go by when he doesn't cross my mind. A part of me still feels guilty about that night.

One year. I am on my way back to my hometown for my high school graduation; I had to finish the last few months on the road due to traveling.

One year. The year I truly needed him. It was my dad who pushed me to live my crazy dream as a kid and look where I was now on, my tour bus traveling across the world. It was everything I could ever dream of even more. But I wish, just wish, he could of been there throughout my journey.

I haven't seen my friends since I left earlier November at the start of my tour. It was hard at first trying to keep up with all the skype calls, homework, press conferences, meet and greets, my boyfriend Blake, well ex boyfriend now, so I kinda lost it all.

It seems like forever since I've been back to my hometown; I guess when you live a full 17 years there you kinda are immune to the atmosphere, but since I've left I've grown up and discover new sides of me. I've met so many new people-inspiring people. Not only am I singing around the world, but I'm helping to create a world that inspires people to keep going—to fight.

That was what my dad taught me.

Minutes turned to hours, the hours turned to days, the days turned to weeks, and those weeks turned into months. Months without sleeping in my own bed, months without my bestfriends, and months without the boy I used to love.

"Emilyn we are here" My mother brushes my shoulder waking me from my own thoughts. I stared at her with a blank face. "We are back in Charlotte."

"I'll meet you inside." I speak softly. I watch as she walks off the bus and onto our grass. I continued to sit there. I checked my phone to see if anyone had heard of my arrival yet.

Nothing.

I stood up grabbing my bag and walked off the bus and towards the all too familiar house; the house that I used to consider home once upon a time.

"Didn't really miss this place as much as I thought I was going too." I stared at my mother as she spoke looking around the house.

"I guess." I simply said to her.

"Go get changed and the driver will drive you to the graduation."

"Are you not coming?"

"Of course Emilyn. I'll just get there when I can." I didn't bother to respond to her and I headed up the stairs truding my bag behind me.

It was all too familiar: the vibrant green walls, the half made bed, the few pieces of clothing I wasn't able to fit in my suitcase, and the pictures surrounding my walls. So many memories here; my best friend Haley and I pretty much grew up in this room.

"Emilyn the driver is here." My mom shouted from up the stairs.

"I'll be down in a minute." I unzipped my suitcase pulling out my white short flowy dress and slipped it on quickly and put the red gown on top. I walked over to the mirror fixing my brown auburn hair with my purple streaks; I decided to just leave it in its yesterdays curls and placed my cap on top.