Most people have childhood memories of playgrounds, teddy bears and toys. All I remember is a gray world. The happiest memories are of a parent's love, which I never had. When I opened my eyes for the first time, I found myself in a foster home, abandoned by my own parents. The only thing that kept me going, that gave me a reason to live, was an angel. An angel in the shape of a little sister. She was the only person I cared for in the world. I loved her more than I loved myself.
Now don't get me wrong. The owner of the foster home was not the devil. She was a very nice lady, very motherly, but she just wasn't my mother. There were lots of children under her care, so she never had enough time for everyone. She tried her best, but it just wasn't enough. So I tried to be a mother to my little sister. At that time, I was happy. Maybe life wasn't worth living, but with my sister it had meaning.
Then one day she suddenly fell ill. She was only four years old. She was innocent. We did all we could for her, but the doctors said she had cancer and that she could not be cured.They gave up on her. I still remember shouting at them, my vision blurry with tears that ran down my face. I did not believe them. I could not.
***
After about a month had passed since the doctors delivered the news of my sister's disease, we lay in bed, hugging tightly. She was beginning to feel much better. I was telling her about something as she fell asleep. After a while I closed my eyes aswell, I was so tired... Suddenly my eyes fluttered open. I realized I was shivering. My body was drenched in cold sweat. Instantly I looked at my sister. There was a slight smile on her face, her arms still around me. I touched her only to find her body as cold as ice. She was motion less. Looking at her like that, my mind started screaming, but my throat was parched. No words escaped my lips, only tears from my eyes; I was looking at the lifeless body of an angel.
