To say I was into him was an understatement. We were in the same group of friends and everything was always friendly. I never intended to give him any ideas, but I guess I was sort of obvious. My friends only told me whenever he walked away and wouldn't warn me ahead of time. He never spoke up about anything he heard and neither did I. I was too shy to admit anything to a guy. Heck, I'd never been kissed unless you count your girlfriends, kissing your cheeks just for fun.
All throughout high school all of us stayed friends and school had just ended. Graduation just let out and now everyone was going to a party in the gear they had under their gowns. It was slightly odd for me to be mingling with others in my grade. I usually just stuck to my group of friends. Our parties were just get togethers of us and a few new guys or girls. All my girly friends would become annoying as hell but that was their way of flirting. Apparently it worked because they'd end up hooking up with the new guys. That's why our group stayed together, though. No one ever got together within us and we were all just friends.
At the end of this summer most of us are going our separate ways so I want this summer to be unlike any before and I'm starting it off right tonight. The graduation party is in someone's backyard and garage. Lena, Sarah, and I were just arriving along with the rest of our group.
Lena parked her car along the curb in front of this guys house. We all got out and I couldn't help but take in the atmosphere. The road was mostly empty apart from the cars aligning the street but there weren't any other houses around. Trees lined the road and they were just far enough at the top where you could see the deep blue sky and the twinkling stars. This area should've been creepy but it seemed almost calm instead.
I was leaning against the back door of Lena's car facing the opposite side of the road for less than a minute taking this in, when I saw Tim walking towards us.
"Hey guys!" He called out and leaned against the car in between Sarah and I. I sent a little smile and wave while he started talking to Sarah. I knew what was going to come next and I was just waiting for him to get out of Tim's truck. A few seconds later I heard a door slam across the street. I'm pretty sure Tim started talking to me but at that moment I blocked him out.
I was staring across the street at Tim's truck when I finally saw Harry. All the air seemed to be taken in that moment and I couldn't hear anything. The first thing I saw was his shoe from underneath the end of the truck. I felt my heartbeat quicken and my breath hitch in my throat when Harry rounded the back of the car and started approaching us. His hands were in his pockets and his head hung while he crossed the street to us. I really hoped no one happened to be looking at me because I could feel my face flush just from seeing him. Harry was now standing in front of Tim and looking at me with an eyebrow raised. I heard mumbling and finally broke out of my trance.
"I'm sorry?" I spoke up.
"Are you going to be our DD tonight?" Harry asked me.
Great. They think I'm such a goody-two-shoes just because I've never been drunk. Or slept with anyone before. However, this was Harry asking me and I think I would do anything for him. No matter how many times I felt my heart break every time he wasn't there for me to drive him home due to being with another girl. "Of course." I said. "Why else would I be here? Ha" I laughed dryly.
Tim responded, "That's why we love you Tally! Plus you're funny as hell." He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and started dragging me towards the backyard while I grumbled.
"You only want me for my driving! And I won't have it!" I nudged him, jokingly, in his side.
"Well you only want me for my bod," Tim said while running one hand from his neck to his waist.
At that I huffed and turned around to see that Lena, Sarah, and Harry were following. I made eye contact with Lena for a moment and she nudged her head forward for me to turn around, but I felt Harry watching me and I wanted so badly to look at him.
Tim and I continued walking towards the backyard of the house where we could hear a faint bass thumping. The temperature was just perfect enough that I wouldn't be sweating or getting cold throughout the night if I stayed outside. My floral dress rested just above my knees and my brown hair hung in waves over my shoulders. I decided to go barefoot tonight because it was finally summer. I knew I'd probably hang out outside instead of the garage anyway. It was more calm and the garage seemed to be too hectic.
We got to the backyard and I decided to sit in the little lounge area by the pool while Sarah, Harry, and Tim headed into the garage. They would either get some drinks and come back out here or just stay in there playing drinking games the rest of the night.
Lena walked over to me and sat across from me in the lounge.
"Tally, he's never going to do anything if you don't say something."
Sighing I said, "I don't want to say anything about it. If he really felt something he would have done something already...at least I think he would have." I shrugged. "I don't want to make it weird by saying it out loud to him because then we can never go back and nothing would be the same. I'm always happy around all of you guys anyway without having to be a certain way with him. I don't think I need to say anything." I was totally lost. I could see me with Harry but I couldn't envision Harry with me. He only had two relationships throughout high school and the girls he was with were completely opposite of me. He definitely had a type. And I wasn't it.
"Tally, if it's how you feel, you should let him know. You know Harry and Harry knows you, he'd never make you feel bad about anything." Lena was trying so hard to make me say something. I really wanted to tell Harry and hope it would be alright, but I was too shy to admit something like that. It's so difficult to get myself to talk to someone about my feelings and with feelings like this it would be even harder. "Tally, you need to let loose and stop worrying. Maybe you can drink tonight? I don't mind being the DD. I don't feel like drinking anyway."
"Are you trying to get me drunk, Lena?" I smirked and tilted my head to ask her.
She laughed, "Why not? We're done with high school and you've been holding back for so long! Just do it!"
"Alright, alright. Maybe I'll have a drink but I don't want to get blackout drunk." We'd been sitting here for about five minutes and more people had shown up. My peers were scattered around the backyard, some on the back porch, some by the pool, and others were going into the garage. I watched a few go in there and I saw Sarah and Harry walking towards Lena and I with two red cups in their hands.
They sat down with us and Sarah started handing Lena a drink when Lena nodded and pushed Sarah's hand towards me. Sarah raised an eyebrow, "Ooooh, Tally we seem to have corrupted you finally."
"Lay off, it's only a drink. I've had one before."
"Tally." I looked over to Harry and he had a stern look on his face. He was babying me, treating me like he was my superior just like he always did. He looks at me as if I'm a little kid.
"Harry, it's fine." I assured him while shrugging my shoulders. "One drink won't hurt. And if I decide to have more, Lena already said she'd be the DD. So it's all good. Don't worry about me." Although I would love nothing but for him to have to worry about me because I worry for him too much. The way he was treating me gave me butterflies but I doubt it was doing anything to him. I loved any attention from him, however I'd prefer if it wasn't him taking care of me like a kid.
I took a sip of the drink and Sarah made a little celebration yell in honor of my drinking.
After I finished my first drink I did feel myself starting to wind down and not care as much. I was about to ask Harry for his other drink but I saw that he had already downed it. I eyed him curiously and he just shook his head and looked down. I stood up to head to the garage when he stopped me.
"Where ya goin?"
I stared into his eyes a little too long then looked away, "To get another drink. Would you like another one?" I asked looking back at him.
"I'll come with you."
