Tied By: AFFECTION

Chapter One

If life has taught me anything, it's that no one is perfect.

I spent two years of my life trying to achieve the 'perfect' label, and I always failed. Every day for two years I'd set myself a goal. Whether it was to get an A in my end of term exam, to asking for ketchup at Mcdonald's. (yes, I know. I'm pathetic) Even the littlest goal is still a goal.

My mum always used to say "The minute you stop caring what others think, is the minute you start being yourself" she was very wise, that's right. Was. She died in a car accident shortly after my 11th birthday. I'll alway cherish the time I spent with my mum, she was loved by everyone. I still remember my grandma sitting me down on the sofa, holding one of my hands whilst the other was firmly holding the blue bunny my mum gave me for my birthday that year. It still smelt of her perfume from when I was watching her do her makeup, she always did it so well.

I still have my dad, but he drinks a lot. He has been since my mum died; he really loved my mum so I don't blame him, I drink sometimes too. It was hard as a kid dealing with all that, I didn't really have any friends either; I had my therapist to talk to whenever I needed someone and I had my dad, he's the best person to talk to. It's easy to tell him everything.

I love my dad more than anything, but I'm not sure how much more I can take. I want him to stop drinking; to actually support us and get money. It's been six years since my mum's death, they were married for twelve years before I was born. I understand it's hard for both of us but I need to move away from him if he carries on the way he is. Maybe I should call my grandma.

"Dad..?" I call, hesitantly walking into the kitchen. I hate seeing my dad drink, the way his face is. I can feel the pain he's feeling as he looks up from the whiskey glass at me.

"Hey sweetheart, how was school?" he slurred slightly, getting up from the chair he was slouched on; throwing his arms out signaling me to hug him. I didn't like hugging him lately, I could already smell the whiskey from the doorway of the kitchen. "It was okay, I guess. Veronica is having a party tomorrow at her house; I was wondering if-"

"Yeah! Have a great time honey, just be home by ten or call me to say you're staying over" My dad interrupted, I didn't trust him on his own but I really want to go to this party. "Are you sure, dad? I can stay at home if you like, we could have a dad and daughter night and watch a movie instead" I suggested.

"No, you go have fun. I'll be okay here, I'll invite some of the boys over. Don't worry, I'm going to order pizza do you want anything?" he offered, we never get pizza? what's the occasion?

"uh, yeah just get some hot wings and a bacon pizza, small please" he nodded and grabbed the phone from the kitchen table. I could still smell the whiskey on him as his breeze blew my way as he reached for the phone, it made my eyes feel as if they were on fire.

I waited downstairs for the pizza to arrive, about twenty minutes for the delivery guy and was about to call the pizza place to complain when out of nowhere I heard the door bell ring, it's about time.

"I'll get it!" I practically sprint to the door and swing it open.

"Hey Kenny.." he muttered, his silky jet black hair that I never forgot was now a wet slicked back dream. My legs instantly turned to jelly at the sight of his gorgeous dark brown eyes that always used to make me melt with every glance, look and stare.

"Alex. What brings you to my doorstep, I have pizza arriving any second"

"I'm back from New York, I wanted you to be the first to know" he brings one foot forward from the doorstep into the coatroom. What does he think he's doing?

"Shouldn't you be informing your girlfriend first? You know, the one you lied to me about for a year? I'm pretty sure you remember" I spat, for a second I fell in love with him all over again then realised the terrible things he did to me and fell right back out all over again.

"Kenny please, you know she's not as special as you are to me. We can work this out, come on, I know my Kenny and I know you can't get over me. I mean look at me"

He's still the same asshole I remember, overly self-confident, overly attractive, sexy...

Mackenzie, pull yourself together. You're better than this.

"Alex, I've come to realise a lot of shit whilst you've been gone being in god knows who at god knows where. You're an asshole. A huge one! I'm not as young and naive as I was 2 years ago, you need to leave because my pizza is behind you and I'm not afraid to push you into that flower pot right there so you land on your ass, so I suggest you stay the fuck away from me from now on. Understand?" I proudly and loudly exclaimed, his face dropped immediately and he slowly turned around each step, thinking I'm going to make the biggest mistake of my life and invite him in.

After a lot of hesitation and disappointed glances towards me, Alex got to his car and drove away. Hopefully for good.