Lived

Chapter 1

Today is a really sad day. Most people believe their last day is a blessing, that knowing you have this one chance to say goodbye is great, but is it really? I feel like today is the worst day of my life. Maybe it's because I am only 17, or maybe it's just because today is a terrible day, but I don't want to die tomorrow. I'm not ready to leave this world. 

Everyone is born with their day of death printed on their wrist, and mine is March 15, 2112 which is tomorrow. Also, no one must know the date on your wrist except your husband or wife. Everyone thinks tomorrow will be a normal day, but I will be dead by the end of it. It just doesn't feel real.

Since no one knows today is my last full day here on Earth, I still have to go to school. School is okay, but I'm supposed to study for a test that is in two days with my best friend, Adriana, and I can't tell her that I don't have to take the test. The whole "knowing I'm gonna die" thing is stupid. Whoever thought knowing the day you'd die was a good thing, was an idiot. 

I've been counting down the days since I turned 17, and not because I'm excited, but because I don't want it to come. Can I please stay here for a few more years, months, or even days? Though, they are never wrong, and there is no way I will be here on March 16.

Walking through the halls at school is like taking your last breathe. You want to saver every little detail, and you want to remember the feeling. At least that's what I believe. When I saw Ad, she gave me this concerned look. "Mal, are you okay? You look very upset."

"I do? Sorry, I'm just worried about that test one Thursday," I said, trying to come up with some random reason for looking upset.

"Oh, that makes sense. But don't worry, you'll do great just like you always do."

I forced a slight smile. "Thanks."

"No prob. Now let's get to English. We don't want to be late." Ad grabbed my arm and practically pulled me to Mr. Harrison's room, but I don't think there is any other way I would've made it there in time, considering I can't seem to care very much about attending class at the moment.

After we both took our seats and the bell rang, Mr. Harrison went on teaching like it was a normal day. I'm pretty sure I zoned out, though, because I jumped when I heard him say, "Malloree, what do you think?"

I had no idea what he was talking about, so I just looked at him, hoping he'd ask someone else. "What do you think of the book, Malloree?" he asked again. Then I realized he was talking about the book we just finished called The Giver, which is pretty old, but has an amazing story.

"Um, I think the book is very well written, and has a wonderful meaning to the story," I said, still kind of embarrassed for not answering the first time.

"What do you mean by wonderful meaning?"

 I hate explaining myself, but I did it anyways. "Well, it's a book about love and knowing that it's okay to know the truth. You should never keep things from people, because they will always find out the truth one way or another."

"Very interesting, Malloree. Katherine, what about you? What do you think of the book?"

He asked about five other kids, and they all talked about how the writer used good choice of words, and how different it was from books we see today. No one else talked about why the author wrote it the way he did, or the theme of the story. This isn't the first time that my answer was different from everyone else's, but it still feels weird when it happens.

After class, when I was putting my books back into my bag, I heard someone come over to me. "Malloree, what you said about the book was so true. You should never keep secrets from people." 

I turned my head to see the most popular guy in school talking to me. Nathan Gold who is really smart, and almost every girl thinks he is super cute. I on the other had think he is just another self centered kid at out school, but who am I to judge. It's not like I really know him.

"Oh, um...thanks Nathan," I replied, hoping he'd walk away, but he instead gave me a smile that every other girl seems to fall in love with, but I just don't see it. I then finish grabbing my stuff, and start to leave. "Bye, Nathan."

I'm not sure if he caught my "I don't care" tone, but he had to realize I'm not gonna swoon over him like the other crazy girls in our school. Even Ad gets all weird when he walks by.

The rest of the day was pretty much a blur. I made sure I gave Ad a big hug and goodbye after our study session. I also gave my parents hugs before I went to bed, which I never do, so they looked at me kind of weird when I did. I started crying when my little sister, Hannah, started heading up to bed, because I have no idea if this is the last time I will see any of them. It was pretty much the worst part of my day.

Like I said earlier, whoever thought knowing the day we'd die was a good thing, was a major idiot.