RESTRAINING ORDER Part 1

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Prologue

The BMW came to a sudden stop at the curb of an eerie, dark road. He yanked the gear in park and stared straight ahead. The vein on the side of his temple pulsated with hot anger that terrified me to no end. In the passenger seat, I was shaking frenziedly as I looked out of the window, too afraid to look at him. The sky was as dark as his mood and even though the heater was on full blast, inside of the car felt as cold as that muthafucka's heart.

Raindrops drummed on the windshield in an ominous symphony that matched the tears cascading down my battered face dripping onto my torn, bloodied blouse.

The fact that he wasn't talking didn't bode well for me at all. I could somewhat gauge the level of his anger when he was going off, spewing deathly threats and unfounded accusations. But when he was quiet like this, I had no idea what he would do. The only thing I was absolutely certain of was that he was going to punish me severely—death was not out of the question.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him pull his gun out of his waist and place it in his lap. At the sight of it, I became terrified. My heart pounded hard in my chest and pee ran down my leg.

He's going to kill me this time, I feared. How could he claim to love me so much yet treat me so foul?

Filled with fright, I began rocking back and forth.

Lord, if you get me out of this safely tonight, I promise to move far away from him, I silently prayed as my body trembled all over.

I jumped when I felt him touch my face. "Baby gurl, look at me," he said with a gentleness that belied the cruel monster he could become in the blink of an eye.

I didn't want to look at that bastard but I knew better than to defy him. Slowly, I turned my head in his direction. He cut the dome light on in the car and locked eyes with me. Stroking my face with the back of his hand, he asked, "Why you trembling? Are you afraid of me?"

I didn't know whether to answer honestly or lie. Either response could incur his wrath, so I decided to just keep quiet. But that was a mistake. "Fuck you gon' do, ignore me?" he growled.

"No," I replied meekly, casting my eyes downward.

"Answer me, then," he demanded. "Are you afraid of me?"

"Yes," I admitted in a voice barely above a whisper.

His response came with lightning quickness.

Whap!

I hadn't even seen him raise his hand but the stinging sensation on the side of my face and the taste of fresh blood in my mouth confirmed why my ears were now ringing.

"Bitch, you ain't scared of me," he spat. "Because if you were, you wouldn't keep tryin' a nigga like you be doing. Would you?"

"No. And I'm sorry," I apologized, though I hadn't done a damn thing but try to get far away from his crazy, jealous and controlling ass. Lord, he was nothing like the man I had fell in love with.

He smiled triumphantly. "Give your nigga a kiss and tell me that you belong to me."

I leaned over and offered him my lips. He covered my mouth with his and slid his tongue inside.

I couldn't help recalling a time not long ago when his kiss ignited a fire in my body that only his insatiable sexual appetite could quench, but now it felt like a serpent was slithering around in my mouth.

I forced the bile back down my throat and pretended to enjoy our lip lock. I didn't dare break the kiss until he pulled back first. "I belong to you," I said perfunctorily.

He lifted the gun from his lap and placed the tip of the cold steel against my forehead. "Say that shit like you mean it or I'll blow your brains outta ya muthafuckin' head!" he threatened.

His tone was as menacing as the weapon he held to my head. "Baby, I belong to you. Forever," I said.

"That's my gurl," he smiled. "Damn, I love you, bae. So much that I'll murder your ass if you ever try to leave me again. You understand me?" He lowered the gun from my forehead to my mouth and forced it inside. I gagged as he shoved it to the back of my throat. "You know, a few years ago I killed a bitch who looked just like you," he taunted.

I didn't know if it was true but I didn't doubt it. He was crazy beyond definition.

"Bitch tried to cut me off. Don't ever try that shit. Because if I can't have you, nobody will. On my life—ya feel me?" His sincerity rang loudly in my ears.

"Yes," I cried.

He removed the gun from inside of my mouth and then leaned in and placed a soft kiss on my tear stained cheek. I prayed his anger had subsided and that I would live to see my son again, but the next words out of his mouth caused me to shiver all over.

"Nah, bitch, you don't really feel me," he said. "But you're about to. Get out the car. I'm 'bout to bury your ass right next to that other ho." 

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