Aaron | ON HOLD

4 ||

Chapter 4

As soon as she left the room, I willed my body to stop reacting. It felt as if it was drawn to her, itching to move towards her body, itching and craving to feel her beneath me, her skin on mine.

I had been locked up in this prison for two years already and I hadn't felt an ounce of emotion or lust since being here. It was easy to fall in to a state of depression and nothingness, and much harder to get out of it.

I felt as if everything I had felt before had left me the instant I walked in to this place. What did I have to life for?

That being said, my body buzzed around her, the petite guard here who looked just as innocent as she probably felt. Her eyes showed me that she was sheltered, her head was strong but she hadn't seen life.

I didn't want to scare her, but she knew exactly who and what I was. To her, I was a monster. To me, I was just somebody who wanted to start feeling something again, on the other hand, I didn't want to get close to anybody new.

I was in here and here was where I was going to stay. She wasn't trouble but she was trouble to me because I wanted her, badly. From going to nothing to feeling this strongly, it was extremely unnerving and it hit me all at one go.

I needed to have her but what were the consequences? More importantly, she didn't want me back. I hated wanting somebody I couldn't have.

She was petrified of me.

Who would want to sleep with a murderer, after all?

With a sigh, I jumped back on to my bunk. It fucked me off that her scent stayed in the room even minutes after she had left. I was a typical animal and my body wanted that scent all around me.

I wanted her. There was no doubt about it.

As soon as I jumped on to my bunk, Jeff came back in to the room. He was a weird man, very skinny and a man I could easily wrap around the toilet bowl if it ever came to it. He was greasy looking but was only behind bars because of a drug deal he had been pulled in to.

He was the optimum of wrong positioning and wrong timing and I saw myself in him at times. I didn't always like him but he was vulnerable and even when I acted differently, I felt it too.

Like I wasn't meant to be here.

"King." Jeff acknowledged me with a firm nod and I nodded back at him. "Has she been?" He asked. I looked to him in confusion.

"Has who been?" I questioned as my legs moved with gravity off the side of my bunk.

"The guard." He said, his voice so matter of fact it made me sound dull, as if I was meant to know what he was on about.

His tone of voice and the fact he mentioned her was enough to piss me off. Why would he care if she came or not to do the daily routine? Why would he care about her?

A weird feeling of jealousy and annoyance over came me. Was I jealous or was I just starting to feel something other than nothing and I was getting confused?

"What about her?" I tried to sound normal but my voice was starting to sound exactly how I felt; fucked off. I hope he didn't notice.