I just couldn’t believe that it had happened. Alexa had been my best friend since preschool, and we had vowed never to stop being friends. We had grown up together, all the way to the summer before grade twelve. We were so excited about graduating and how we would be adults soon. We were both determined to get boyfriends and jobs, and we would go to the same college too.
All of this was before Alexa got sick. I don’t know how the doctors didn’t see anything before it was too late, but that’s what happened. She was always so excited about life, always crashing headlong into everything without a second thought. Seeing her in the hospital, thin and pale as a sheet, it was like the disease had killed her off long before she actually died.
Two days after school started again, she died. My parents let me take a week off. Sure, I had known she was going to die, but still, having it actually happen was terrible.
All day, I wandered the empty house like a lost ghost, either crying loudly or sitting, absolutely silent, lost in my memories. Having had a best friend for so long, one didn’t really have time for other close friends, so now I was alone. So completely alone.
One day, I took a walk in the park near our house. I felt awful and didn’t really want to be out, but I had been sitting around for too long as well.
The wind was chilly, blowing dry leaves all around me and down the pathway. A child and her mother walked ahead of me, and the child laughed as the leaves fluttered around her like butterflies. I envied her, in a melancholy way. She didn’t know what she had, to feel so happy and carefree.
Finally crashing onto a secluded park bench, I wrapped my arms around myself and sighed. Even though the sun was shining, it felt like the world was cold and dead. The future had been so hopeful, Alexa and me together, conquering the world. I had always been the shyer of the two of us, so I had always relied on her self-confidence. Now I was nothing.
“Hello.” Someone sat down next to me. I was surprised but said, “Hello.”
“What are you thinking about?” She asked, looking at me curiously. She seemed to be as old as I was, and her hair was the exact shade of red as mine.
I shrugged, sighing. “Life. The future, mostly. I had hope for the future once, you see, but now it really scares me. I had a best friend, and we were going to face the future together, but…she died.”
She nodded, taking this in. Then she laughed a little. “Why even bother thinking about the future though? I mean, who’s to say there even is a future for you? You might die tomorrow, for all we know.”
Her words startled me. “I…I don’t know, people always seem to have plans for the future. They’re always thinking about it.”
Tossing her hair, she said, “Seriously, don’t bother with the future. It probably doesn’t exist. I mean, it seems like you’re pretty much a wreck right now. I don’t see how you can even think about facing the future.”
Her words stung me deeply this time and I looked at her. Her eyes reflected mine like small mirrors. I looked at myself in them and knew she was right. “I am a wreck, I guess.” I said with a sigh. She patted my shoulder. “Oh don’t worry about it. You’ll get through this. See, I’m here to help you.”
“You are?” I asked, wondering who on earth she was. She nodded confidently and stood up. “I’m going to take care of you, from now on. To help you deal with the loss of your friend.”
Standing up, she stretched a little and then held out her hand. “Come on, let’s go back to your house. And don’t worry about anything. I’m your friend now. You don’t have anyone else anyway.”
