What If We Were Not Coexisting, But Only Living At The Same Time

Your lips formed the words hello and goodbye, 

but you had shown that we were not worthy 

we were nothing but in love,

but you never saw a point in falling in love.

But I was selfish to think that I was the only one you loved.

That I had made your happiness happen.

Maybe our love was only a journey to realise we do not feel anything but something at the same time. 

That we were only hurting each other because we had claimed that love was our only feeling,

but I hated myself for falling for you so quickly

I looked into your eyes and stared,

how my heart felt one thousand things but love,

how I had felt envy and utter hate.

You reminded me that we could forget that we are not in love,

But we are only here holding hands.

We are only here to regret our choices,

I am afraid.

But my heart wants to love you.

I feel so much, but I just can not love someone so simple,

You were covered in your inky lies,

but I went blind,

So turn my ashes into diamonds, 

so I can posses something beautiful,

turn me into a locket so I can posses a picture of the girl you had made love to that night.

I can feel you.

I can feel your burning desire.

But I cannot see you,

I can not see your lips move. 

I cannot see your white lies.

I wrote love poems for you, 

but you had never held them close.

Darling, our love was laced with cocaine,

Our love was laced with ecstasy,

You only loved me when you were high,

I loved you when you were out of your mind.

I only loved you when I had to clean up the blood off the walls and bleach the carpets,

I only loved you when we were fighting and you wanted to leave,

Because I am miserable with you, I am miserable without you.

You never made me stay,

but only I made myself stay because I felt nothing but empty.

Because our love was my only form of assisted suicide,

loving you meant I had to kill off everything,

loving you meant I am still alive,

Darling all along I had craved you,

but I was so scared of falling for you.

My heart is scared of love.

But I was the liar all along,

because I never loved you

 I locked eyes with her,

Until I stopped thinking about the misery you brought me...

Until I felt her,

That is when I knew...

I was sorry for ever loving anyone in the past,

because when I saw her the memory of you was hanged by a noose from the tree in my backyard.

Because when I met her,

I was free from you and everything you had caused