Exquisite // Blake Richardson -New hope club

Chapter 1

* A year earlier *
Blake's p.o.v
Tears freely running down my cheeks, bloody cut up knuckles from the mirror I had just punched. Even with my blurry eyes I can still see how much of a mess I was at the moment eyes tired, cheeks red, my hairs a mess but honestly that was the least of my worries. My tie is loose and I've practically rip off the blazer from my suit. Why her, why the love of my life I think to my self. My crying gets louder and so does my grunts as I curl up in a ball on the floor sobbing into myself. Tapping my foot against the floor harshly. My once white shirt was evidently covered in blood, I stop crying for a moment and loose my breath. I run my hands through my hair and start crying even harder than before throwing my head into my arms.

Suddenly I hear the bathroom door rip open and heels running over to me,I don't stop to look up and I know I won't. Abbie grabs my arms and throws them over her shoulders leaving me to sob into her shoulder. She doesn't speak understanding what I'm going through. "Why me, why her? She didn't deserve this" I mutter but it's barely audible. "I don't know Blake I don't know but please get up off this cold floor and get changed it breaks me too see you like this." She orders me, I still sit there shaking my head back and forth we stay there for a few more minutes before she yelled for mum. Mum runs in knowing it would be me she needed to attend to, her hand held up to her mouth at the site she was looking at, she was still dressed in her dress. We were all still dressed in our outfits, our outfits that nearly made me gag at the sight of because of why we were wearing them. She kicked her heels off and ran to me hugging both me and Abbie. They were trying there best to help but honestly I couldn't deal with it, but instead of telling them that I just stayed there, crying harshly with dried up blood over my Knuckles.

"Please darling please get up" my mother practically begged after a long time not being able to bare her son breaking down in front of her for much longer. I didn't respond and just got up. Weak at the knees, hands hurting and light headed. I hadn't been feeling much different over the last couple of days, but this was definitely my worse day. I shake my head at the thoughts in my head as Abbie and mum watched me carefully. As I walked past the now broken mirror I hear crunching from it's remains when I walk over it. I walk straight past and go to my room. I hear Abbie and mum talking but I didn't listen. I close the door and rip my shirt off violently and throw it aside. I grab a plain black tee and put it on and take of these horrible suit pants and put on shorts. I wanted to listen to music, I needed a distraction and fast. I grab my phone and turn it on seeing picture of us two together on the lock screen. I stare at it for a few minutes and I feel anger rise up in my body. My breathing gets heavy as I keep looking at it. The longer I look the more mad I get until finally I throw it at my wall. Not Satisfied enough, I walked to the wall and punch it, I punch it until i feel numb, as numb as my heart. A grunt leaves my lips nearly everytime I punch the wall and blood scatters on the wall.
"Blake please" I hear mum yell as she runs to me for the second time tonight. She grabs my fist as it's about to reach the wall, and I start shaking my head to her, my lips start to quiver and I'm fighting back the tears

"Do you really thinks she would have wanted this" mum questions me, I start to see red quickly rip my hand from hers. My blood boils at her words.
" do you think she would have wanted this? Really mum really. Do you think she would have wanted any of this, no she didn't she had plans, she had dreams we did together we have our lives planned out, and guess what she still died, and she didn't want it so mum whether she wanted this or not it's happening shitty things happen mum but oh that's life that's fucking life isn't it" I yell at her, my fists clenched and I saw the fear in her eyes. I saw it plain and clear. "just get out mum" I spat out, she tried to talk to me but I just repeated my previous words and she finally left and gave up. Shutting the door behind her, I finally started to calm down. I sat in my bed just crying for awhile before deciding to get up and grab my phone. Glass broken to the fact that I could barely see the screen but I could still used it. I turned on my music and feel asleep due to the lack of sleep I've had these last few days.

Waking up happy for a split second then feeling the pain in my hand. I look down to see my room in a mess and my hand in a state. Covered in blood and cut up. Memories from last night come flooding back, the mirror, the yelling, my phone. I can't believe what my mother said last night, how dare she. I get up out of bed, familiar feeling of knees weak and light headed but I ignore it and grab clothes to go for a shower. Once I entered the bathroom, I notice the mess I had made was cleaned up. I turn in the shower and strip before getting in. My fist started to sting but it was okay it felt nice besides that the water trickling down me was relaxing, I was finally a little bit relaxed. I looked down and saw the bloody water and felt happy. I stayed in there for a long time before finally getting out. As I was leaving I ran into Abbie. She pulled me into another hug and told me to take it easy.
" Abbie can we please watch a movie or something anything" i begged her to which she immediately said yes to, asking if I wanted to watch toy story to which I nodded to. When I went downstairs about a half an hour later I saw a fort with fairy lights, lots of cozy blankets and popcorn. I smiled at the thought of things feeling back to normal even though they would never be normal again without her. We sat down and started to watch my favorite movie.

Half way through the movie, my mum came in, still mad. I tried to ignore her and after calling my name a few times she got it. Abbie was so confused so I presumed mum didn't tell her about our fight. Once mum leaves Abbie stays looking at me confused after a few minutes she decided to pause the movie and speak up.

"Blake what was that all about" she questions confused. I explain the story and she stays silent which means she either a) mad but doesn't want to tell me or b) scared to say the wrong thing.
When I finished I just press play on toy story. When the movie finally comes to the end I start to get sad again. We used to do this, chill out and watch movie sometimes build a fort. It would be perfect if she was here. Abbie starts to clear her throat signaling that she was about to talk stopping me from my sick thoughts. " you know, mum was just trying to help and I know it's so tough for you but please try to see her side, she was trying to stop you from hurting yourself Blake and now she breaking thinking that her son hates her, Blake it fucking sucks I know it fucking sucks but please talk to her your heads messed up Blake right now your over thinking too much she need you and you need her you just want someone to be mad at"Abbie pleads, I can't believe she's on her side. I shake my head back and forth and do what I've been doing best lately walk away. I didn't want to fight with Abbie but I know if I stayed I would. They don't understand it, they won't. They just need to leave me alone. Abbie calls me but I just tell her I need time to think. Instead of heading from my bedroom, I go up into the attic for the first time in awhile. I don't really know what came over me, I just wanted to go up there I pulled down the stairs and went up them once I reached the top I turn on the light and started sneezing with the dust. I looked around for the light and switched it on. I immediately spot our old sofa and go and sit on it. I sit there peacefully looking around the room.

I see lots of things, my old toys Abbie's doll house, Are Christmas tree and many more things. The one thing that sticks out the most is my old guitar. I haven't seen that thing in ages. I sit up and go to grab the guitar, the familiar feeling of sting comes back when I open my hands to grab it. I wince but continue. Once my hands get a hold of it. I immediately start to play her favorite song. She used to always make me play it, I used to play it so much I could never forget the cords. Memories of playing it in my room and my kitchen and outside and her dancing to the song or singing along with me. The lyrics started to flow out of my mouth like it was the only thing I knew. Tears start to slip but I ignore them, I can't believe she's gone... how can she be gone.
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Very short chapter for chapter one ❤️ hope you all enjoy this story please add to your library, comment and vote my lovelies 😘 yours truly katie X