Are you playing victim, super hero or both?

I HAVE BEEN PLAYING VICTIM, I HAVE BEEN PLAYING SUPER HERO NOW IT'S TIME TO PLAY ME. Sounds very scary.

Today I was on a group call and one of the call to action home play was to do a Facebook Live call this week. Even though I have done many workshops and live calls on Zoom and Skype and talking on live radio shows including Dubai Eye 103.8, I just could not do this so in the group I kept finding excuses and giving reasons on why I could not do this action. The facilitator started talking to me when one the group members spoke up and said 'Sharon, get over it' and then the facilitator said that she was not going to facilitate me on this subject any more and then moved on to another topic. I was stunned, hurt and tears started welling up in my eyes. I stayed for the rest of the call but I was furious and had already started wording out a text to her about how she could have been more kind to me and how dare Carla, the person in the group tell me to get over myself.

I sat down and shed some tears and just then my friend texted me and asked me how I was and I replied that I was feeling down. Now that shook him up as no matter what storm I am facing in my life, I usually am capable of handling it and it does not effect my happiness. I then told him that I was playing victim and feeling like a weak person dressed in armor so people would perceive me as strong and courageous and I would feel strong and courageous and can take on any challenge that comes my way.

When there are any challenges (and we have faced several), my family depend on me to make things better. As such I play super hero and use all my powers as a woman to keep them feeling nurtured, safe and confident that the challenge shall pass and that everything is going to be ok. 

I told him that now it is time for me to take off my armor and show my quiet strength and it felt scary. He replied that 'I think you're already doing it. You have such inner strength and I don't think you have anything to worry about'. He then told me 'Get up, breath, tell the truth even if it leads to your downfall... keep protecting the weak and smile' (that's his way of saying keep helping people). He then told me something that brought even more tears to my eyes. He said 'Sharon, you can do it, you are smart, sexy, worldly and confident. Now pull yourself up and out of that chair' which got me thinking that yes, I am everything he said I was and more.

It's now time to close the back door and start living my life authentically. It's time I stopped escaping from my authentic self by playing super hero or super victim. It's time to work with my quiet strength and release the need to be seen as a super hero or super victim when it suited me. It's time to see that Sharon + my imperfections = magical Being rather than Sharon + my imperfections = be ostracized. Stop judging your imperfections and start seeing it for the gift it truly is.

I choose my imperfections and acknowledged it for its power. When I talk about my imperfections and acknowledge it, I give other people permission/freedom to acknowledge and accept their imperfections because it is these imperfections that make us different, unique. When we look at nature do we judge each flower or tree or pathway? We just absorb the beauty and uniqueness of each and every thing we see. The same way you look at different form of nature, look at yourself this way because no matter how many flaws you have, you are beautiful. You have an inner beauty that needs to be seen, you have an inner voice that needs to be heard - express yourself just the way you are. If people don't like you for who you truly are, then they don't deserve you. Be kind to yourself, love yourself and BE yourself, nothing else matters.

Lots of love,

Sharon

If this article helps and if you have any questions do write to me at sharonrose.monteiro@gmail.com (remember it is MONTEIRO and not MONTIERO.

It's time to stop playing victim, stop playing super hero and start Being the authentic you.