Verklempt

Journal Entry

Hello nobody,

Do you ever have a sudden wave of realization? Well, it hits you like a truck, emotions washing over your entire body, threatening to tip over the edge of sanity. That one person who your life seems to revolve around, no matter what you do.Being with them makes you so happy, it feels like a high. To you, everything seems like it will be alright. When they're gone, your chest aches and it's hard to breathe, it's as if your heart truly is breaking.

Well today I just did. I was taking a stroll in the forest, contemplating life, as usual. I had lazed down in a meadow and it dawned on me that no matter how many flowers I tried to admire, all seemed pale in comparison to HIM. The sun beaded down on my skin, the wind tickling, me as it danced east. My mind drifted to HIM, a smile that could light up the universe, eyes sparkling like diamonds, a voice like velvet, and kindness that only angels could posses. He was a person who could only ever be in books, someone you would dream of being with as a child. I see him in everything, all the good in the world seems to stem from him. Everyone shaking their heads knowing I could never be with him. But I can see it, the slight movements when we are near, out bodies, magnets pulling towards each other, the only thing holding us back is fear, who has tightly wrapped itself between us.

But the pain, when we weren't near each other, oh it was unbearable. The longing, the resistance took all of my energy. It pulses, coming in waves, inspired and triggered by a mere phrase. Hearing their name, my head would snap to the sound. Everyone talks about what it is like to be with a soulmate, but what about when you've met them and can't be with them? Then, a soulmate seems terrible, the power one person can have over you.

Imagine them not even knowing you. Imagine if they weren't real.