Finally Living

"Don't pretend to be anything other than who you are. Let people see the real, flawed and imperfect person that you are."
* * * *

 The sun beamed upon my face,my gaze was locked onto the cloudless sky, a shining blue that could allow me to feed off of it's beauty.

Across the window, I can see the alluring Kyoto Tower and I'm having a pretty boring day as usual. That is, until I was poked repeatedly in the shoulder.
"Can you stop doing that?" I asked coldly out of irritation.I knew who it was already.
"Stupid Kyle, don't you want to go home already?" That guy who just called me stupid is my best friend, Vince.
"Fine. Whatever, let's go."
Together with him, I got up from my chair and left the classroom.

When I looked up into the sky, the sun was too bright for me to see. I felt my head aching from hearing the honks of cars and all I could hear are loud conversations around us. Shortly, there were some girls from our school that walked passed us.
"Hey guys!" they exclaimed in a flirtatious tone.
Smiles are said to boost a person's mood, so I smiled. Particularly this guy Vince, who never stopped winking at them. As usual, they reacted like fangirls. "Vince! Come on, I'm gonna be late for my part-time job." I yanked him away from the girls. This kind of behavior of the girls always pisses me off, as they always assume that they are close friends with us.
"Eh? Are you jealous?" He asked.

"You wish," I replied.
It was surprising to me that a guy like Vince, who puts me to shame and does the exact opposite of what I do, became my best friend.

 As I walked down the street, I noticed that the sun was setting, filling the sky with orange and yellow hues.
"I almost forgot! When will you be at work today?" Vince asked, speaking in a deep and cool voice.
"Later at 17:30." He nodded his head at me and went inside the house.

 Vince moved out here with his father and older brother when we were kids. Our friendship began to blossom at that point.

Our front door creaked as soon as I opened it. Kei, my little sister, welcomed me.
"Mom already made dinner. Let's eat. She told me you got a new job today?" I nodded.

Student nowadays find it easy to find a job. In the past, some girls from my school came into my work and bothered me. There had already been several instances of this. The first time was when someone at school noticed that I was working at a restaurant, and gossip spread like wildfire.
    Is it necessary for him to work there?
    I was expecting him to work as a host.
    His face was a waste, I wanted him to be a model.
I admit that I am popular, but I did not say anything about wanting it.

"Kyle? Welcome home son." Mom greeted me when I reached the dining room. I gave her a smile and went to my room to change.
Books are on the table, clothes are in order and journal... is on the floor. I bent my knees to grab the little notebook. All the words I wrote here on this journal.. are disgusting. Downstairs you see the perfect picture you'll ever see.. I wish.
"So, how was the school today Kei?" Mother asked, while blending in with the clanking of the cutleries. Kei explained everything, how her day was in our school. She is only a year younger than me so there is really not much difference.
"What about you Kyle? How's your day with Vince?" The tone that Mother used that time was a version of teasing. The clanking stopped for a minute there and started again. "C'mon Mom. The answer should be obvious right? Kyle?" Both of them laughed at me. This is great, having a family who doesn't stop teasing you. Dining room is the only place that bonds us together, since Mom has to go work overnight everyday.Yet, my great-hardworking Father already left us. It really doesn't matter anymore. "Mom, I'm off to work." I made my voice louder so she'll be able to hear it. The door creaked and heat started to come into my face. I took off the chain from the bicycle. I was going to leave until I saw a shadow coming towards me.
"I'll go with you." Vince smiled at me. He's all dressed up casual and a cap. Seems like he wants to stay hidden, in that way no one from our school can recognize him.
He invited me to ride his motorbike, but we're still minors. Therefore, keeping up the pace with him was a bit hard but I still did it.

Shortly, we've arrived to my workplace. There's only a few customers there, which means no one found out about this place yet.
"Three hours Vince. You don't have to wait for me." I parked the bicycle in front of the cafe and opened the door.
"Huh? Are you an idiot? I came here for food and girls. When did I say that I'm gonna wait for you till you shift ends?" Oh great. I just did the most embarrassing thing in my life.
I clicked my tongue out of annoyance."Whatever." I went inside the cafe, and I had everyone's attention. Mostly were the girls, they won't stop staring at me until Vince followed inside, and that's when their attention transferred to him.

Well, girls..
What should I expect.
This is not new for me anymore, it became their nature already to judge a person by appearance. It is not only us who are superficial. No one bothers about things they cannot see. Like the heart, these girls does not like me as a person, rather it's all about our face. I had a lot of girlfriends before, but none of them worked out at all. They were so disappointed when they realized that I was not the guy they were expecting me to be.

"Choco milkshakes and cheesecake!" One of my co-worker shouted, at the same time, he placed the tray on the front desk. No one was available to serve it except me.
"Who should I give it to Shane?" I asked.
"Oh. On that table, where the delinquent-looking guy is sitting."
     He pointed at Vince, and he's wasn't joking when he told me his reason why he's here. I went to their table and dropped the tray.
"Oh here it is. That was fast, dig in girls. It's on me today." Vince placed his arms around the girls beside him. He's gonna treat this girls when he just met them today and he doesn't even bother spending money on me - his bestfriend.
"Hmm. This waiter looks cute."
"You're right! What's your name?" The girls asked while trying out the foods I served.
"You guys gonna replace me already?" Vince said in a goofy voice. However, before I speak up Vince just glared at me.
He's mad, because the attention of the girls he is with went to me. I understood immediately. Those looks made it clear, I carried the tray and left. I saw two men beside Vince's table, their looks meant more than friends.
Just what are they doing .. I thought.

Meanwhile, customers have stopped coming. The moon was so bright that you can see it through the window, the place was so quiet that all you can hear is the screeching sound of the crickets.
"Good work today Kyle! Thanks for staying for another 2 hours." Shane said. All of us started cleaning up so we can close the cafe, I was only supposed to work for three hours but there was still a lot of customers earlier so I stayed a bit longer.
"Thank you. By the way, I saw this two men earlier. They looked like they were dating."
I started preparing my things so I can go home.
"Ah. Don't think about them if you feel disgusted. Anyways I'll go home now."

Disgusted. Of course, everyone would probably say that.
"Kyle! Someone's here to get you!" At first, I wondered who it was. The girls from school,my Mom, -- or Vince. I ran outside to check out of curiosity. He was leaning on the wall while on his phone.
"Yo." Vince raised his hand at me that signals hello. I ignored him. I took the bicycle where I parked earlier, however someone held the back seat to prevent me from going.
"Kyle? Where are you going?" That situation pissed me off. He's acting innocent like he doesn't know what he did earlier. Well, if I'm going to think about it carefully it was better for me too. He can take all the girls he wants so they can also stop bothering me. That's what I thought.
"Home, obviously." I stepped on the pedal and was going to leave. But Vince pulled the bicycle forcely that made me fall off the bike.

This guy.

"Kyle. I waited for you, I thought you were only gonna work for three hours?" He said.
"You're the one who told me that you weren't going to wait for me." I stood up from the ground and faced him. "Don't tell me.. You were mad about that?" He was about to laugh but I glared at him. "Sorry, Sorry hehe." He said.
"Let's go home, I'm tired." Vince nodded at me and took my bag. I rode the bicycle again and I let him rode at the back.
I guess this is just normal for friends, right?  I thought again.

The citylights during the night is really pretty. Cars aren't passing by that much anymore and the people who are walking probably just came out from work. Later on we both arrived in our own houses. Lights are all turned off, you can really tell that everyone's asleep already. I said goodbye to Vince, since my body can't take it anymore. It hurts and heavy. Shortly, I let my whole body fell off the bed.
My emotions are all mixed up, stress are taking over my head. The journal that I found earlier was still here. I've wrote a lot of things about Vince during Christmases, Summer vacations, Spring breaks, Birthday celebrations and Valentines Day.
I folded the pages that I wrote, it was all useless and disgusting. Until I saw the letter I wrote during Valentines day 5 years ago. I wasn't expecting to be here, I thought I already threw it away.