Separation of Four

Each pop reminding me of that agonizing day. The day that made me who I am today. Every action taken leads up to this very day. It's been a decade since that tragedy. Tears of joy for where I have been able to go. Oh, the things that I have been able to see. At that time, each scream was for help. My lungs crushed. The sadness never goes away. Ever. It feels the same every time it hits. I try not to think about it, but how, when every pop reminds me of you. You made this day special. Your imprint is everlasting. It almost makes me forgive you. Until I remember that I must forget you. Never would I have thought that my favorite day would turn into the one I hate the most. If I had a device to skip over this day, I would. Every waking moment, reminds me of you. Everything. From the scent, to the joy surrounding me, and seeing them flying off shelves. The morning after bringing fog, where it's blurry to most. It's the day that I began to see clear. The smell of smoke, not from them, but from the train that I thought I was put on by the wrong person. All along that person was for me, while you were leading me in the wrong direction. You forgot the things that you created in this world. So, you felt as though you could draw your own map. Instead of being in my world and you just living in it. It became your world, and I wasn't a part of it. I came to terms with it long ago. It's just hard to fathom how one minute someone was here and the next they are gone. No matter how old I get, that will always reside in me. However, the time is up, this is me remembering you for everything that you did do. Now I just prepare for my day. The day that didn't matter to you. I'm turning 20 soon. I must hold my head high. If not for you, for them. The ones that I have to look in the eyes everyday. I love them, the same way that I loved you.