Rules Of Attraction

Chapter 1

“Do you know why you’re here, Hannah?”

“Because we’re a fucked up generation where people only care about money. You randomly charge people with medical bills stating that I’m going mad when in reality I’m fine as fuck.”

The doctor sighs and Hannah snorts. Every time, everyday, she always renders her doctor speechless. They’re going in circles again and again and honestly, she’s tired of it.

The people surrounding her keeps on pushing her or motivating her to move on but Hannah could only laugh and shake her head. Move on from what? She was the one who said that there was never a thing between them, that all those feelings were just a figment of Hannah’s imagination. What a stupid thing, really.

“So, moving on.” The doctor cleared his throat. “What did you learn for the past few weeks?”

Hannah just stared at him. They exchanged conversations through eye contact for a few minutes before Hannah spoke again.

“I learned that you should never let your happiness depend on something you may lose.”

“Why’s that?”

“Everything’s temporary. Your car, your house, everything that you own, even your life. The feeling you have now is not forever.”

Sam studied those blue eyes, studied how they hold so many emotions. He took off his glasses and sighed. He took one of her cold hands and spoke. “I may not see things clearly yet I can see how much you’re going through. I hope one day you’re as happy as you’re pretending to be.”

Hannah tore their gazes and instead looked outside. She busies herself, memorizing the rhythm of the tip tapping of raindrops against the window.

Don’t let anyone inside, Han. Remember what she did.

Something snapped inside her, making her alert. She stood up and started slipping her jacket on.

“Hannah?” the shock on his voice was visible and Hannah silently smiled. “I’m going. Cancel my appointments. I may not come back for a few days.”

And with one last glance at him, she left.

A funny thing about life is that, even when you’re already an adult, there are still rules to follow even though you can already handle yourself because, well, you’re an adult. But sometimes, adults do the most stupid things and tonight, Hannah felt being a teenager again.

Mamrie, since the incident, went full nursing mode on Hannah. Sometimes, she steps into their friendship line just for her friend’s sake. She even proved one of Hannah’s lines: “Mamrie’s my wife”, because they’re glued to each other ever since the time when things went downhill.

But tonight is one of those nights where Hannah just wants to get drunk. Not like a party drunk but drunk where you forget your name and you wonder what’s wrong in the first place.

So instead of going home, she disregards Mamrie’s text about coming home early and went to the nearest pub.

One thing she likes about this place is that it’s loud. Loud enough to drown your own consciousness telling you to get out before you regret everything. But Hannah already had a few drinks and everything felt right to her. She already regretted being alive in the first place, why not make another one?

A few more drink and she’s lost in her own paradise. The heat was too much to handle so she popped open a few buttons and squeezed her way towards the dance floor. She found a body and started swaying along the stranger’s body. The heat was unbearable and Hannah was enjoying the sweet torture.

Everything went numb. The fire inside her was burning her alive, she can almost see the red flames. The night continued for the blonde.

On the other side of the town, a woman with the same fiery hair sat outside the balcony waiting for her warmth to come back.