No Halo

Suicide Warning

"WE ARE PARAMORE!!!!" The crowd screamed at their final show of tour five in their hometown of Nashville Tennessee. Hayley couldn't help but to tear up again as everyone held up their pink paper hearts against their flashlights one last time as the band walked off the stage. Logan, Justin, and Joey all walked back to gather their things back to the bus right after the show ended as they always did, while the rest chatted with family and friends backstage.

Hayley would usually need to step aside to catch her breath for a few minutes and have a quick drink of water, but she has had something more important on her mind this past week, and she needed to find Taylor.

"Hayley!" a familiar voice echoed from behind Her. "Mom?" She replied while looking around her. Hayley soon felt a warm embrace, startling her at first, come from behind as Christi engulfed her in a huge bear hug.

"Y'all sounded so good!" Christi exclaimed.

A not so fake happy smile spread across Hayley's face as soon as she recognized the voice. "Thank you!" she replied, spinning around to return her mother's hug.

"How is T doing? I noticed he looked.. a little less like himself today," her mother said with a concerned expression.

"He seems to be doing well as far as I know," Hayley responded, although this might not have been a completely honest answer. Afterall, she knew the same things that plagued her were still plaguing him.

"I was actually going to ask you if you had seen him. I have something important to tell him," Hayley said.

As if on cue, Hayley caught sight of a head of bouncy curls approaching over the top of her mother's head.

"Taylor!" Hayley yelled trying to catch Taylors attention. She began rush towards him but was stopped by a tight grip pulling back on her wrist.

"Could it maybe wait just a few minutes?" Christi questioned. "Your sisters have been dying to say hello."

As eager as Hayley was to speak to Taylor, her sisters meant the world to her, so she supposed she would be able to wait a few minutes. She supposed everything would be fine. 

--

It was pitch black outside as Hayley made her way back to the tour bus. She could tell it was getting extremely late, but fortunately for her that meant she wouldn't have to deal with the usual crowd of fans waiting outside for her, as they had already gone home hours ago.

As much as she loved this tour, it had taken all of Hayley's energy. She hadn't even slept eight hours total this last week. On tour, she barley slept. She never minded how tired and busy she was though, because most of her late nights were spent chatting with Taylor for hours on end in his living room, which felt like more of a home to her than her own.

Hayley walked into the tour bus and let her eyes close for just a moment as the cool air from the bus hit her and the door swung close. Everyone on the bus seemed to have fallen asleep already, so Hayley tried her best to remain as silent as possible as she slowly made her way back to her bunk, using only the beam of light coming from the bathroom to guide her. Upon seeing that the bathroom was currently occupied, she chose to skip her nightly routine of changing into her pajamas and washing off her makeup. She began to dose off soon after rolling into her bed as she listened to the strange dripping sounds coming from the opposite end of the bus. She assumed someone must have left the sink running in the bathroom. The odd noise was in a strange way soothing to her as her glittery eyelids began to feel heavy. It also reminded her of something, but she was just too tired to remember. Maybe she needed to tell someone something? But as she began to fall asleep, she thought to herself that if this thing was really important, she would remember in the morning.

-

Hayley shot up from her mattress, hitting her head on the bunk above her as she woke up to a terrorizing scream.

"TAYLOR!!!! TAYLOR NO NO NO NO" she heard Zac yell, and suddenly she remembered what she had forgotten the night before.

-

She didn't show up to his funeral, but she showed up to his house. She didn't move a muscle, she was quiet as a mouse. She felt as if time was frozen since that day. She stared across the room at the empty seat where Taylor would regularly lounge. At times she swore he saw him there, but she was looking at her self.
She stared at herself in the mirror behind the chair. She looked like a mess. A car engulfed in flames, a total wreck.She could only imagine what her concerned family members, fans, and friends have been thinking the past week while she isolate herself inside T's house, but she couldn't bring herself to check her phone, because maybe that's what could have saved him. The things she had forgotten to tell him that night, things she should have said through call or text, things she was just too busy to say but now regret. Just maybe, this would have saved him.